The male population should be satisfied when I say that women do just as many dumb things as men. While these things may happen far less often, and a majority of the time caused by something a man has done, we do have moments of stupidity and ridiculousness. As a woman, I can honestly admit that we all have experiences where we have looked back and thought, “Why did we let our ovaries take over our mind on that one…?”
Women are kind, nurturing, fun-loving creatures, until you tell us we look fat in our yoga pants, take away our Salt & Vinegar chips, or blatantly flirt with the waitress in front of us, and then you might lose a testicle. I have said it before and I will say it again, we are NOT as complicated as you make us out to be. We may be a little absurd at times, we may even be *occasionally* dramatic and we may be a little crazy now and then, but mostly, we are misunderstood.
Here are the 13 ridiculous things women do that are definitely misunderstood:
- We overthink. We will over analyze your texts, Facebook pokes, and Snapchats to the point that we are losing our minds because we do not understand your lack of concrete communication. Example – You stop texting all of a sudden. While you may have just lost interest and didn’t know how to end it, or your phone died and don’t have access to a charger, we have a wide range of thoughts; you dropped your phone in a lake, you thought we lost interest in you, or you were kidnapped.
- We cry… A lot. A rude comment, a Hallmark commercial, cute animal videos, Taylor Swift with yet another break up, a sale at Victoria’s Secret… We cry when we are happy, we cry when we are sad. We can become just a blubbering basket case full of emotions. Come prepared with some tissues, chocolate, or possibly an apology.
- We can create a problem out of nothing. Don’t worry, we’ll overanalyze this later and see we were wrong for crying over you not understanding why it was a big deal to run out of Green Tea, but we need you to just understand it is an emotional time and let it go.
- We are at times too “passionate.” Maybe we shouldn’t yell at you and say, “That’s fine that you are ‘too tired’ to see me. I bet my booty call isn’t.” Maybe we shouldn’t throw objects at you either, but we just want to get our point across to you at any expense. Even if that means breaking our phone in the process. It’s not like you were responding anyway.
- We are built with reproductive organs that make us Satan 3 to 7 days a month. Yes, we may threat to harm you or just burst into tears at the drop of a Dorito, but you can blame our baby makers for that range of emotions. Just never ask if we are on our period or you will find out what Satan is like personally.
- We don’t get over things easily. We remember everything. Every little thing. Every detail of every day and we will hold it over your head at any time. The fight is never really over; the unfinished business will be brought back up on a later date when you screw up again.
- We tell you too much info. We may tell you every detail about our day, and sometimes overshare a little, but it’s only because we want you to know and we want to hear the same thing from you.
- We don’t tell you enough. “It’s cool.” “I’m fine.” “No worries.” This is what we would call pissed lingo. It’s never cool, we are never good, and yes, you should worry.
- We will try to “change” you. We are hopeful that you will get our of your “bad boy” stage, your “drinking” stage or your “I like you, but don’t want a girlfriend” stage for us. We know what we are getting into, but we are always hopeful that we can get you to change to include us in your life.
- We have “romantic comedy” high expectations. Blame Nicholas Sparks for this. We have set the bar high, hoping that men will meet or (preferably) exceed it. We are waiting for you to start a flash mob for us or something out of The Notebook, so when you can’t even follow through with a simple date, we turn back to our romantic comedies to ease our heartache. And the vicious cycle begins again.
- We expect you to be mind readers. We expect you to know what we are thinking at any given moment. Rather than just telling you, we expect you to pick up on the subtle hints or blatant signs that we put right in front of your face.
- We are too trusting. We give it away too easy. We believe men when it comes to sexting, monogamy, or when they say they are working 900 hours a week for the next year… We are way too trusting that you will do what you say you are going to do and believe you when you say you will not, because that is just how we are built.
- We are better detectives than the FBI. Truly a gift and a curse. You tell us we are “crazy” when we accuse you of talking to other women, but give us five minutes, a computer and some rage and we will have every detail about your new bimbo, down to her favorite color. Just remember gentlemen, if you think you are being sneaky, think again…
As hard as it is to admit, ladies have just as many downfalls as men do. We may be a tad crazy, a little overwhelming at times, and far more dramatic, but we are also something to be appreciated. All we want to do is be loved and give that love back in return; we just sometimes have a weird way of showing it.
Don’t hate us for wanting you to want us as much as we want you and going about it in ridiculous ways. Also, do something a little out of character now and then to show us you are still interested. A date, a pie, or a Nicholas Spark movie night should do the trick!
Featured Image via screen grab from Silver Linings Playbook.