I’ve never been the kind of girl who took her time in the morning. It was always: brush teeth, brush hair, wash face, put on a little mascara, and go. Not only was it because I was usually running from school to volleyball practice or to a theater rehearsal, but it was also because I just never really understood the appeal of makeup in general. Taking extra time in the morning to cake on some tan foundation, evening it out, putting eye makeup on, making sure your eyeliner was even? No thanks.
And suddenly, I was doing my makeup every day.
At first, it was a bit of a hassle. My morning routine was suddenly so much longer than before. It took so much time in the mornings and if I forgot to take my makeup off before I went to bed, it was a nightmare. And, I felt like I was constantly waiting for someone to look at me and tell me my makeup looked terrible. I kept waiting for someone to tell me that I shouldn’t wear makeup because it wasn’t helping anything. But that never happened.
Instead, I started getting into the habit of getting up a little earlier to make sure I could wash my face and do my makeup well and still have enough time in the mornings for myself. I started making sure I took off all my makeup before bed so that I could wash my face. And I realized that, for maybe the first time ever, I was taking really good care of my skin.
Instead of washing my face with a harsh cleanser and then going throughout my day, I was also moisturizing. My skin was soft and shining. Even when I wasn’t wearing makeup, I felt confident in my skin, something I’d never felt before. Sure, I’d still get the occasional breakout when it was *ahem* that time of the month, but I still felt like my skin was healthier than ever.
And beyond that, I felt more confident in myself with makeup on. It’s not that I was trying to hide my true self or that I think I’m ugly and need to be made up, but even with foundation, light eyeshadow, and mascara on, I felt more like myself. Every outfit I put on, even just a t-shirt and jeans, felt better because I knew that my face didn’t look schlumpy.
I just started taking better care of myself in general.
If I was going to put in the extra effort for my makeup, I wanted to take better care of my hair too. I conditioned my hair a little more thoroughly, I made sure it dried well, I wanted it to look healthier. To say my hair and I have a good relationship would be a total lie. My hair is coarse, thick, and for the most part, unmanageable. But I put in those few extra minutes with my hair, and suddenly, it wasn’t so difficult to deal with anymore.
I also took more care in choosing my outfits for the day. If my eyeliner went on perfectly that morning, I wasn’t going to pair that with a simple sweatshirt! Sure, I was still wearing all of my clothes, but I just felt like I was putting in more effort to match my shirt to my pants and taking one last look in the mirror before I left for the day.
I felt more confident all-around. My hair looked bomb, my face looked great, and my outfit was good, too. Why wouldn’t I strut my stuff around campus, going from class to class? I felt like I was smiling more, I was more willing to be more sociable than normal, and ready to face the day.
Even on the days that I don’t put on a full face of makeup, I still feel confident and ready to face the day with my eyeliner and mascara. I like the person I am now. I feel like I’ve grown more confident in myself, my body, and my face. And if it took doing my makeup every day to feel that way, then so be it. I like it. It’s a new me, and she’s great.