I’ll be the first to admit that I’m guilty of lusting after other relationships. Post-Nicholas Sparks movie binge watch I’m always left in a pile of tears wishing my significant other would build me my dream house like Noah built Allie. Big romantic movie gestures are what every relationship girl daydreams about, but sometimes that daydream can make you bitter.
Social media is a deceiving little devil. Couples post pictures on Instagram showing the best parts of their relationship. It’s easy to get sucked into the false reality that they have created and compare your relationship to couples such as Jay Alvarrez and Alexis Ren. Even worse is comparing yours to that of other couples you know and maybe even double date with. This is unhealthy and unrealistic. Relationships are more than the flowers they post on Instagram, the spontaneous dinner date on Facebook, or the twice weekly shout out on Twitter.
Strive to be in your own relationship and don’t copy others.
Relationships can be hard sometimes and they require work from both parties involved. This is why communication is so incredibly important. Don’t go running to bae with a list of demands after bawling for two hours over Noah writing Allie 365 letters, trust me they do not want to be compared to a Nicholas Sparks character. You should focus more on what you have rather than fantasizing about unrealistic expectations. Remember, these are characters based off of a book not real life. These fantasies will only hurt you and your S.O.
There is nothing wrong with wanting the prince, the castle, and all the fireworks over the scenic landscape. Love makes you feel like you’re Cinderella at the royal ball. It fills you with joy and adrenaline. You feel like you can do anything because you have your prince or princess by your side. Don’t ever let that feeling escape you but also never compare what you have to what others have. There is no difference. The only difference is that one is completely pretend and the other one is yours. Relationships are different colors and sizes; they are incomparable.
So what if Zayn wrote a love song about Gigi? Your bae came home with your favourite bottle of wine on Friday night. So what if Channing Tatum posted a ridiculously romantic Instagram post about Jenna Dewan Tatum on her birthday? Your bae let you have the last piece of bacon on that hung over Sunday morning. Just because your relationship doesn’t consist of “perfect movie moments” doesn’t mean it’s not filled with magic. Sometimes burnt cookies and hand-made valentines cards are better than declarations of love on red carpets or jumping on Oprah’s couch.
Remember, Nicholas Sparks is separated from his wife and is making a fortune off love stories. Don’t get caught up in these fairy tales – they are a work of fiction not what your life should be like. If that isn’t any indication that you should maybe not copy other relationships than I don’t know what is. Seriously, why would you want all the drama and turmoil of a Sparks relationship anyway? No relationship is perfect but that’s because people aren’t perfect, and that’s what makes them so fun. Imagine how boring life would be if bae never argued with you about what to eat for dinner or chirped you for your drunk snapchats. Sometimes the perfect S.O. is your polar opposite.
If you spend your time copying other relationships then your life is going to look like a game of The Sims. Put down the controller and take a break from the Instagram couples. They will always be there but your guy or girl may not be if you continue to copy other people’s love. Create your own love story with your other half don’t recreate somebody else’s.
Featured image via Brandon Woelfel.