Sex is complicated. No, I’m not talking about the physicality of it, though all of those positions can get pretty tough…what I mean is the emotion behind the act of sex. It can be intimate, meaningless, heart-warming, rough and sometimes even a little bit of everything.
What makes sex even more complicated? Sex on the first date. You wonder “Will he call me back if I do it? Will we date? Will he judge me?” The list goes on. Luckily for you, I have the answer on what he will actually think!
Okay, not really, but I kind of have the answer. I decided to text a bunch of guys far and wide. Frat guys, former college athletes, former Ivy league men, party boys, entrepreneurs, and deep thinkers, all between the age of 21 to 35. Here are their long anticipated results:
Please note: I promised all of these lovely gentlemen that I would not include their names, and these are their direct quotes. My question for all of them was: “What do you think about girls that have sex on the first date?” I asked them the question before I revealed I was writing this article, and once I told them my intentions, I later asked if they wanted to add anything else.
The Playboy That Will Make An Amazing Husband One Day:
“I don’t think anything specific of them. Like I’m not gonna be like, ‘Wow, she’s a whore‘ or anything. I’m a guy and I would have sex on a first date so why would I judge a girl who wanted to do the same?”
My Former Uber Driver:
“I think nothing wrong about with girls choosing to have sex on the first date…their bodies….their choices.”
The Guy Who Has Slept With 40+ Girls:
“Doesn’t matter one way or the other. If I like the girl I’ll keep talking to them whether we have sex or not.”
“I think they should go on a date with me.”
The Nice Guy:
“I’d continue to have sex with them. I know there’s the stigma that girls that have sex on the first date aren’t wifed up material but I’d personally give them the benefit of the doubt and wouldn’t judge. And probably still date them.”
The Guy I Met While Volunteering:
“I’d say it’d be pretty much impossible without both parties being drunk.” HE SPEAKS THE TRUTH “And honestly where I’m at today I wouldn’t go through with it. Maybe a few years ago I would have, but now that’s not how I want to start a relationship…I’m just against sex on the first day in general. Guys or girls. That’s not what you should be doing haha. If a girl wanted to, it wouldn’t change my opinion of her. I think it would affect the relationship in a mostly negative way if we had sex on the first date. It’s physical intimacy without the necessary emotional intimacy to handle it.”
This Guy I Met At A College Tailgate:
“Well it makes my life easy, but I think girls shouldn’t be judged differently than guys and if they like someone why not.” He is currently dating his girlfriend of almost a year that he had sex with on the first night.
The Older Man That I Met At A Bar:
“I don’t think it’s a good idea, but one of my best friends is marrying a girl who did with him, so who knows. If the girl is looking for a long term relationship then it probably only has downside (although I’m not sure it’s fair). If she’s just dating for fun then go for it.”
My High School Friend aka THAT Guy:
“Love em, cuz I like sex. Make sure that head game A1 too.”
The Deep Thinker:
“It really depends on the woman. If I planned to have something serious with a woman that may not change just because we had sex on the first day. That also depends on how good her sex is lol. One one hand, you can argue a woman who does it on the first date isn’t scared to feel vulnerable…on the other hand, you can say she may be reckless, lacks discretion, etc. I experience and evaluate. Wasting time thinking through every scenario is pointless.”
The Frat Lord – Think Scott Disick:
“Depends on a lot of stuff. Wouldn’t date long-term most likely but not a bad thing necessarily. She would have to resist these moves ya know.”
All in all, as confused as we are ladies, so are they. There is never a golden answer to decisions, and you live and you learn after decisions are made. Obviously, if your gut is telling you don’t do it or do it, then you should TOTALLY listen. But, I say go with what you feel and what you want to do. It’s your body, your actions, and the only person you deserve to answer to is yourself.