Instagram Husbands: 5 Thoughts You Have When Your Girl Is Married To The Post

“Behind every cute girl on Instagram, is a guy like me.”

The folks over at Mystery Hour recently put together this hilarious video that reveals the truth behind all those oh-so-perfect Instagram posts you see filling up your feeds. Have you ever wondered what goes on behind the camera of those sexy bed sheet shots, or perfectly posed ‘everyday models’? Check out what they came up with:

While these men have literally climbed great lengths to fulfill their duties and make the loves of their lives happy, we’ve decided to compile a list, in tribute to these soldiers of 5 scenarios they’ve likely found themselves in while snapping away their perfectly positioning lives for the world to see:

  1. The mouth-watering photograph of a cranberry muffin – just barely crumbling onto the clean white plate, and their caramel latte complementing the oak wood table that it rests on. As perfectly positioned and delicious it appeared, my latte went cold, that muffin went crispy with a stale essence of disappointment, and my wife only got 200 likes. She deletes photos unless they hit 600.

  1. Sunshine is pouring in through the window and our bed sheets have never looked so white. My wife’s perfectly shaved leg is peaking out and my hand rests sensually on her upper thigh. It was 5 degrees in our apartment that day, and my wife should really be wearing pants. We also woke up at 5:30 AM to catch the perfect lighting and we had to bleach our sheets 5 times, ruining 4 sets of towels to get them this white. She was upset because I couldn’t keep my eyes open wide enough to focus the photo right.

  1. Our vacation essentials picture of designer sunglasses, passports, wicker hats, and a perfectly folded bikini really screams Hawaiian get away, doesn’t it? We had 4 suitcases for that trip. That hat didn’t make it out of the house because my wife hates how she looks in hats. To say the least, our ‘essentials’ aren’t quite that minimalistic.

  1. The photo of my beautiful girl’s hair blowing in the wind as she looks out on the deep blue water just shows how majestic and relaxing our vacation was. We took this photo 47 times before the wind hit her hair at the right angle, and used 7 different filters to get the water that blue. I had to climb into bushes that I’m almost certain caused the poison ivy rash on my lower leg. My wife got a nasty sunburn, and there were a few times I contemplated pushing her off the cliff, but we’re #relationshipgoals so, I would never.

  1. The photo of her lounged out along the shoreline sure does look like it’s fit for a Victoria’s Secret advertisement. Her hair muffled up sexually in her grip, and the waves crashing up around her almost naked body. Too bad for that poor kid whose sandcastle we had to kick down and to the older woman who yelled at us to cover up. I must say this shot really misrepresented the aggressive tides that day as we took shot after shot of her getting knocked over and pulled in by the undertow.

It truly does take a special kind of man to embrace us females along with our photo-loving addictions. Documenting our lives can be a great self-esteem booster when we have thousands of dedicated followers cheering us on. To those human selfie-stick men that make these posts possible; we thank you.

But for the young girls staring into their phone screens wishing they could live these ‘perfect’ lives you see in the Insta-sphere, they aren’t truly as perfect as they appear. Let’s share a laugh for the sake of these instant photos, and their lack of instancy at all. The video mocks these girls and how “we need to show everybody how much we enjoy our lives together” but is it really all that enjoyable when you’re living through 5 hours of battery life and 16GB of storage? Go give your hubby a kiss for all the selfies and #ootd shots he’s supported, and chug back a hot, straight off the press latte with no photos necessary. A picture does tell a million words, but we all know that won’t fit into your 150 character bio.

If you’re an Instagram hubby suffering in silence. You’re not alone, find help today at instagramhusband.com

Featured Image via Sam Ciurdar.  

6 COMMENTS

  1. This article was extremely insightful! I loved hearing from the person behind the camera because it’s insane how many times it takes to get a perfect shot and how hard it is to get it right.

    • It is crazy to think about things in new perspectives; especially when it comes to our beloved social media representations of our identities. In reality, there’s an entire other identity behind the camera helping us portray ourselves a certain way!

    • Thank you! Instagram can be a great way to show the world what we’re doing and keep our friends/family up to date but I would agree, society has distorted its purpose so much to the point where its really not all too ‘real’ after all!

  2. That video is hilarious and the article shows how embarrassingly dedicated we all are to social media and aesthetics. I’m totally guilty of going above & beyond to get the “perfect” angle of something. Also reminds me of how many people hide behind their Instagram posts & use them to show an alternative life… a happier life. Really like the truth in this piece.

    • I’m guilty too; snapping multiple photos with only subtle differences even. There are many clear cut truths in the humour of the video and I love how it showed the spotlight on the reality of these glammed up lifestyles that so many girls aspire to have!

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