Adulting Is Hard: 10 Things You’re Too Old To Get Away With

The lavish 7 year old lifestyle of eating fast food as much as you wanted and staying up until the early hours of the morning at sleepovers may not seem as appealing to you now as it did then. If only we could have back all of those hours of free playtime we once had, along with our agile selves and bumped up metabolisms. Quite honestly, I don’t know that us 20 somethings would be able to handle it… Sometimes I wish I could go back to my younger years of eating Nutella out of the jar without consequences or watching movies all day long without the looming threat of not passing my courses. Oh what I would give to be 10 again. Here are 10 things you used to get away with as a child but you’re just too old for now:

1. Eating McDonalds at least once a week. You know those nights your mom wouldn’t cook or the nights you spent at your friends’ houses whose parents didn’t want to cook either? McDonald’s (or even Wendy’s) was always the go-to play date meal. I don’t think my wallet or stomach could handle this weekly treat anymore. But I do miss those happy meal toys. 

2. Monkey bars. What’s the fun in being only a couple inches off the ground? Even as short as I am, the whole suspension thing isn’t going to happen for me. 

3. Laying on the floor just because. For some strange reason, many children love laying on the floor, as did I. Now, I don’t think I can even get on the floor let alone get UP from it… Exception being when I’m wastey pants and the floor looks like a 5 star hotel bed. I somehow still manage to end up there from time to time. 

4. Staying up all night at sleepovers. I’m sorry, friends, but this body just isn’t what it used to be. We all loved talking and watching movies all night, but as you get older, it just gets harder to stay awake. Let’s be real, you can shoot me as many stupid questions as you want or sing as loud as you can, but I’m still going to be asleep on your couch by 11:30 pm. 

5. Hiding a bag of candy in the shopping cart. C’mon. C’MON. We’ve all done it. You really want the candy, but you’re afraid to ask in the middle of shopping, so you hide it in the cart under all of the other stuff. When it comes time for check out, you know your mom will just throw it on the conveyor belt with everything else and buy it without realizing it. Back in the day if my mom noticed, I’d get a smirk and a, “Did you put this in here? Okay you can get it” but now it’s more of a, “Why is this in here? You have money, go buy your own candy”. 

6. Taking more than one lollipop at the doctor’s office. In my younger years, whenever I would get a shot, you best believe ALL of the staff at my doctor’s office were ready with multiple lollipops for me, the “screamer”. Even when I didn’t get a shot, I would walk into the secretary’s office and pull out AT LEAST two lollipops (and secretly take a third). Now I’m lucky if I even get one at all. Can you believe how unsympathetic the secretaries are toward 20 year olds who still see their pediatric doctor? 

scrubs, jd, and funny image

7. Trick-or-treating. Halloween has always been my second favorite holiday behind Christmas. I would trick-or-treat from right after school until the early morning hours when people started to turn their lights off. However, inevitably we are forced to resign our pumpkin shaped tote bags and witch hats for something more adult-y like a party, or handing out candy to the next generation. Even though we all know deep down that it would be so much more fun to have a bag full of sweet treats rather than a cup full of bad jungle juice. 

8. Staring at people. C’mon, who doesn’t get a little curious now and then? Little kids are the most curious of us all, as they don’t understand certain things yet. Yes, we’ve all been told it’s “polite not to stare”, but no one is going to get mad at a child for gazing. Nowadays we can’t stare long enough without either having to compliment (so as not to seem creepy) or make awkward eye contact and pretend you weren’t staring.

9. Smiling and making your cutest face to get away with doing something bad. This was my superpower. Now, not so much. Don’t think moms would be very happy to find their 20 somethings playfully smiling at the ground and kicking imaginary dust while their favorite potted plant lays broken in front of them. 

10. Using the “mom said no” excuse. My absolute favorite thing to get away with as a child. Mostly because the power was all in my own hands, as my mom was very lenient towards everything and ALMOST never said no. Remember texting your mom to say, “Mom I’m going to ask you if _____ can sleepover, but you have to reply no, okay?” Mom’s the real MVP on this one. 

Not gonna lie, I’ve actually tried to do some of these things now that I’m older. I might not be able to get away with trick-or-treating or smiling my way out of a wrongdoing, but I still steal a couple of lollipops at the doctor’s office every now and then when the secretary leaves the room. I’m in my 20s, but I’m still a 10 year old at heart. 

Featured Image via Brandy Melville.

1 COMMENT

  1. Sometimes I wish I could go back to being a child and have no care in the world. I also wish I could do some of the activities I once could, but we all have to grow up and learn responsibility.

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