It’s Friday night and you’re finally done with that paper you’ve been trying to finish; the paper you didn’t even give a thought to until Thursday night at 9 pm, because you were stalking that guy on Facebook. No, actually, you weren’t just stalking him, you also somehow stalked his mom’s friend’s cousin too. Anyway, two drinks turn into seven and before you know it, you wake up in your best friend’s bed with no pants on. You gasp a breath of relief since you remember taking those off yourself.
You reach for your phone, open your messages, and all of a sudden the face of Raven Symone getting a vision comes over you. You probably texted the guy that you always say you “really don’t care about.” Or the guy who you decide to text, when you get a little liquid confidence, until he can’t stand you. Or the guy you stalked on social media who’s mom’s friend’s cousin you ended up stalking as well. It’s 2015, so I know one, if not all, of those apply to you. We’ve all been there. Unfortunately for me, I swear my friends purposely let me keep my phone while intoxicated just so that they can have some sort of entertainment the next morning.
The best yet was the guy I texted over/under (def over) 12 times with no response. But when he finally decided to respond, the reply was “shut up.” I took that “I really don’t care” to a whole new level considering after he told me to shut up; I did the exact opposite and proceeded to repeatedly text him.
Some may call it desperation, while others call it determination. Reading through those texts the next morning, regretting every other word, made me a little more than nauseous at first. After beating myself up about it for about an hour, I realized there was absolutely no point.
So what, you revealed way too much? Maybe you were begging? If he didn’t answer, move on. If he rejected you, move on. If it scared him away, move on. You’re not stupid, you were drunk, and if the person can’t handle it, consider it a sign. There is nothing wrong with apologizing, but never apologize for being you.
Moral of the story: drunk text. Drunk text the sh*t out of him (maybe under 12 times to avoid any harsh demands.) If he doesn’t want you, who cares? There’s someone out there who will appreciate that he’s on your mind when it could barely function. Next time you’re cringing over those drunk texts that you’re “so embarrassed over,” stop yourself. If you don’t ask, the answer will always be no. And if you don’t go after what you want, you’ll never get it.
And if you still feel like an idiot, just remember that at least he didn’t tell you to shut up.
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