I’ve always had a dream of being a wife. I want the perfect little family with 2 kids, a couple of dogs, and a white picket fence. However, only recently have I realized that I might be a terrible wife. So, to my future husband, here is my apology.
1. I can’t cook to save my life.
Forget cooking — I don’t even like being in the kitchen. I hope you like take out because we’ll be getting a lot of it!
2. I hate sharing my bed.
I also hate sharing my covers. Unless you’re my dog, don’t touch me while I’m sleeping, please. You won’t like what might happen.
3. Everything has its place.
If the item is not in its proper place, then it’s lost.
4. And if the item is lost, I’ll blame you.
We’re a team. With that being said, if I lose an item, we lose it. Together. You’re sharing the blame with me.
5. I hate sharing my space.
It’s my bathroom, my bedroom, and my desk. I think you get the idea. Stay away.
6. I don’t know how to budget.
So I expect you to not only support my Target obsession but also to encourage it. There’s no stopping me.
7. I hate making decisions.
It doesn’t matter what it concerns. Whether it’s regarding dinner, the number of children we want, or where we might live. You’re not getting a decision from me. It’s just not happening. Sorry.
8. I can’t compromise.
It doesn’t matter what it’s about. It’s my way or the highway, babe.
9. I hate sharing my TV time.
I mean, do you really want to watch HGTV or TLC? Well, I didn’t think so. Let’s just get separate televisions.
We all have flaws, and this includes me. While I can’t promise to be a perfect stereotypical wife, I do promise you this.
I promise to be your best friend. I promise to support you no matter what. And I promise to always adopt a new dog into the family, even if it’s the 27th one you’ve brought home. Most of all, I always promise to love you and love you extra on your hard days. And….
I promise to be the best me I can be.