4 Life Lessons I Only Learned Because I Was Cheated On

Being cheated on sucks. It hurts. It makes you feel worthless and useless. You question your worth, you question what you did wrong, you question… everything. What could I have done differently? What did I do to push them into the arms of another person? As much as being cheated on does hurt, you can use it as a learning experience for yourself and for your future relationships.

You are good enough.

First things first, do not question your worth after being cheated on. You are good enough, you are smart enough, you are pretty enough, everything about you is enough. Just because one lousy person did not see it, does not mean you aren’t perfect exactly how you are. Often times, we beat ourselves up and compare ourselves to the other person involved in the cheating.This is the worst thing you can do. They are not you, there is only one you out there, and you are beautiful and fantastic in every way. Never, ever question yourself.

It is NOT your fault.

After being cheated on, you begin questioning yourself and what you could have done differently to keep this person from straying off with someone else. Ultimately, you cannot control what someone else does. You cannot control what another person feels. You can treat someone like gold. And if they decide to venture off and be with someone else whether it be a short-term fling or a long-term affair, you cannot stop them. You deserve to be with someone that is loyal, that person you were with was not. That is on them and not you. You could not have done anything differently to keep them around.

You will love again.

Do not think you won’t be able to move on or find someone new that will make you just as happy or happier than the person that cheated on you. Know you will find better, you will be happy again and you will fall in love with the right person. You won’t have to question their loyalty.  You won’t have to be in constant fear or have anxiety. And the whole relationship will be different, and it will be beautiful. You will trust again and you will find the right one. Give it time, and don’t rush anything. Focus on yourself and being the best version of you, so that you can bring that into your next relationship.

It is okay to heal.

As much as you are hurting now, it will all be okay. Use this time to grieve and to heal. Use this time to learn more about yourself and to do things you love doing. Get a new hobby, go out and make some new friends and meet great people. Get yourself into reading and writing. Find something you love doing and that is your own personal escape.

Don’t beat yourself up after someone was disloyal to you. I know your heart hurts right now, but that is okay. It is okay to feel angry and upset you have every right to feel that way but you will move on. Look yourself in the mirror everyday and remind yourself you are worthy of love. Don’t let this temporary problem permanently affect you.

Learn from it. Move on. Be better. Always smile and be happy. You deserve it.

Featured image via Photo by Vincent Delegge on Unsplash


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