You Can Absolutely Have A ‘Hot Girl Summer’ Even If You’re Not Feeling Hot

Last summer, I plunged back into the dating world after ending a difficult relationship. I joked with my friends that I would have a “hot girl summer.” But honestly, most of the time, I didn’t feel “hot.” I was picking up the pieces of my life after a turbulent five years, and no amount of red lipstick or bikinis could make that process any easier. 

Plenty of women wonder how they can have a “hot girl summer” if they don’t feel sexy at all.

The truth is that turning your summer into a “hot girl summer” means that you take the time to invest in and celebrate yourself, even if it’s for the first time in a long time. You no longer wait around for someone to love you because “hot girl summer” means that you prioritize your dreams and know that you never needed anyone else to help you reach them. You live for yourself, finally understanding that you’re whole on your own.

“Hot girl summer” involves so much more than simply being attractive. 

When you make big changes in your life, you may feel scared and unsettled. When you trade in the familiar for the unknown, you give yourself the chance to start over and replenish your cup. Leaving your old life behind is a terrifying step, but if you don’t let go of the things that hold you back, then you’ll never move forward. “Hot girl summer” is about leaping into the unknown because you know that you deserve better than the stagnation that you feel right now. 

You can still buy new outfits, change your hair color, and wear red lipstick, but you can also have a “hot girl summer” without embracing your appearance. Just because you don’t feel your sexiest doesn’t mean that you can’t enjoy your life.

After all, happiness stems from inner peace, not outer beauty.

I spent years altering my appearance to try to find happiness. But each time I lost weight, changed my hair color, or wore trendy makeup, my happiness was fleeting. Society sells the idea that looking “perfect” will solve all of your problems, but without working to embrace yourself, you neglect yourself. Changing your appearance to try to solve your problems is like wrapping your struggles in a pretty package and hoping that they’ll go away. 

“Hot girl summer” is about healing. It’s about looking at yourself and identifying how you want to grow. Once you take the time to truly see yourself, you need to give yourself the care that you may not think that you deserve. You need to learn to trust yourself again instead of trusting others who don’t have your best interests at heart. And the more inner work you do, the more you’ll start to feel at peace with your appearance. You’ll start to see yourself in a different light. You’ll smile more and remember who you were before your struggles began. 

If you want to finish this “hot girl summer” feeling better than ever, don’t change yourself in ways that don’t feel true to you. To have a “hot girl summer,” all you need is self-love. 

Featured Photo by Xennie Moore on Unsplash.