Women faking orgasms is a tale as old as time. It’s also one of the oldest sexual tricks in the birds and the bees book. Many men don’t realize it since women are proficient at faking it — it’s easier for us. But don’t worry, I’m here to give you all the insight as to why girls fake it and how to fix it.
Before we dive into it, let me educate you on how to tell if your woman truly orgasms. Typically, women orgasm more frequently by clitoral stimulation. So if she appears to cum, slap or rub her clit while paying attention to her movements. If she flinches, shakes, or moans quickly, she came. If not, she’s probably faking it.
1. You don’t know how to make her orgasm.
There’s nothing to be ashamed of — we’re all learning all our lives, and that’s the best part. Plus, what works for one woman doesn’t work for another. However, don’t let that discourage you from wanting to have sex with her. Start by learning how she likes to be touched. Ask her questions about what she wants in the bedroom and what she enjoys. Then, put it into practice. It might feel uncomfortable asking her these questions, but it shows her that you genuinely want to make her cum. As I like to say, if you’re comfortable enough to have sex with her, you should feel comfortable enough to talk about it with her too.
2. She’s trying to boost your ego.
This is common for a lot of women. However, it just needs to stop, plain and simple. If she keeps faking it, you won’t understand what she needs. She’s doing you no favors by doing this, and I’ll throw women under the bus for this one. To fix this, don’t call her out. Instead, take the time to learn what makes her cum. Just like I mentioned in the first point, pay attention to her body language.
3. She feels like her pleasure doesn’t matter.
This is extremely common and sad, but unfortunately, women have been conditioned to think this way for centuries. For years, it has been believed that sex is only supposed to feel good for the man. Luckily, as we age, we learn that it’s not true. So don’t make her feel like her only role in the bedroom is to get you off. Even if you don’t make her orgasm, do the things you know she enjoys. Chances are, she probably doesn’t expect to orgasm every single time anyway.
4. She wants it to end.
First of all, don’t take this as an insult. Sometimes we’re just over it and ready to get on with our day, and that’s just that. Another reason could be that she’s no longer turned on, and it starts to hurt. While there’s no real way to fix this common tactic, there are ways to avoid it. Pay attention to her cues during sex: If she’s getting quieter or is showing less energy, do your best to wrap it up. And if anything, feel between her legs and check if it’s still wet — that could be the case too!
5. She’s worried about offending you.
Again, this is not an insult. Instead, it’s a compliment — she prioritizes your pleasure. She might be nervous about how you’d react if you tried to make her get off and couldn’t do it. Again, try to compensate by pleasing her still, even if it doesn’t lead to an orgasm. And emphasize that sex is a two-way street and that you care about prioritizing her sexual pleasure too.
It’s important to know that just because she isn’t orgasming doesn’t mean she’s not enjoying herself. A lot of women struggle to reach an orgasm with a partner. It also might take a while for them to get to that level of comfort. Patience, empathy, and the desire to figure out her body are the most fabulous combo for an excellent result. Just make sure you’re putting an effort to please her genuinely instead of doing it half-assed so you can get it over and done with.
