There’s a huge misconception that short-lived relationships are not meaningful or significant in our lives. But that rumor is simply not true. I strongly believe that the length of a relationship doesn’t validate how deep of a connection two people share.
There are so many ways a relationship of any kind can impact you, from friendships to working relationships. People have the power to leave a lasting impression on us anytime. Plus the memories we share or lessons we learn can happen at any time.
Think about it: Your feelings plateau or decline at some point in every romantic relationship. And regardless of how long a relationship lasts, the stages of love we experience still happen.
Every relationship’s beginning is so pivotal because you not only make a lifestyle change, but you learn about yourself. In fact, you have the potential to learn the most in shorter relationships. Just because you didn’t get a happily ever after doesn’t mean it was a bad relationship. In reality, it means you accomplished things like vulnerability and love while learning about your needs.
Let’s say you start dating someone who only wants to see you three days a week and barely texts you. You then feel annoyed and unsatisfied because he isn’t what you hoped for in a partner. Once it ends, you realize that you value communication and quality time most.
It’s also important to recognize that short-term relationships impact us emotionally. It’s OK to validate that it still affected your feelings.
We often feel ashamed and hide our heartbreak when we part ways with someone we’ve only been with a few months because we don’t feel like the relationship was serious enough. We also feel judged by others for feeling that way. In actuality, we should be OK with remembering to validate our feelings regardless of how silly you feel for doing it.
Regardless of the length of your relationship, you still go through it emotionally when it ends. You hoped it would last a long time. Maybe the breakup even blindsided you or left you feeling sad because they don’t even want to remain friends. You can even feel upset, confused, and angry over almost relationships. No matter what you feel, it’s all valid!
Longer relationships also don’t always equal #goals. I think about how many people I know who have been in long-lasting relationships and how, more times than not, their relationship lasted way longer than it should have. They either stuck it out in hopes that things would change, because they felt too comfortable to leave it, or feared to be single. These relationships were also toxic at times and they just couldn’t seem to bring it to themselves to get out.
Humans are capable of attachment and emotional connections. You are not some zombie who doesn’t have any feelings.
Don’t view your failed relationship as a failure because it was far from it. View it as an experiment gone wrong but you only learned more information for the next attempt to complete it. Your short term relationship is as significant as any other, so don’t feel like you can’t mourn that loss or be sad about it.