4 Things You Learn When You Have Both A Dad And Stepdad

When I was two, my parents divorced. I have lived my whole life without seeing my mother and father by each other’s side, which is extremely depressing if you think about it for too long.

Because I was so young when they separated, I of course heard the “At least you get two Christmases!” line over and over. Let me tell you – it is not worth it. Having to hug one parent good bye on Christmas morning after opening presents never gets easier, or nor does knowing you won’t see them again until New Year’s Eve.

Naturally, I could go on and on about all the things that suck when you are a child of divorce, but I’ve got to say, there has been one huge blessing in disguise. My mom remarried when I was 10 and ever since then I have been blessed with two dads – my biological dad and my stepdad.

I love both of my dads just as any daughter loves her only dad. They both hold very special places in my heart and both annoy me and protect me more than necessary. Despite the times when my biological dad sometimes feels replaced by my stepdad (Dad, if you are reading, you aren’t being replaced so chill out.) Or the times my stepfather spends worrying about what boys I date or what grades I am getting (Relax, I made Dean’s List.) And despite the fact both of them never want to let me go, I would have to say that having two dads is so much better than having one.

They made me a well-rounded person. My dad always encouraged my athletic side, coaching me in soccer, and cheering me on from the sideline. This athleticism was not only good for my body and mind, but also taught me teamwork, communication, and helped when applying to college. On the other hand, my stepdad taught me to explore my artistic side; supporting my theatrical endeavors without question, helping me learn to read music, and discussing music and movies.

They taught me the meaning of hard work and sacrifice. My stepdad worked through college and still graduated at the top of his class. He continues to sacrifice his family and leisure time to provide for the ones he loves. My dad taught me the value of sacrifice as well but through another route. He has been a single father for much of his life; therefore he chose to give up his own education and career goals for his children. Through their actions, I have learned that family comes before all, and I need to take advantage of all opportunities that come my way.

They taught me to value love more. Now that I have grown up experiencing the effects of divorce, I know that I never want one. I am in NO rush to get a promise ring, get engaged, or get married any time soon. No, instead, my dads have shown me how people should act in a relationship. They have taught me the value of my worth so I do not feel I need to quickly hitch up. Not to mention that every other girl’s boyfriend only has to impress one dad…can you imagine two overprotective ones being the judge of every boy?

They bring out the best (and strangest) version of myself. My stepdad and I always joke about characteristics that I magically inherited from him. My stepdad has is this goofy guy with a really “not funny” but hilarious sense of humor and somehow I that I feel like I’ve “inherited” to a degree. As for my dad? He taught me style, through his preppy put-together style and emphasis on how the world perceives me. Being concerned about how other people perceive is just a reminder that if I ever want a job or want to be respected in life, I need to look the part.

Whether you have one dad or you’ll be walking down the aisle supported by two one day, don’t hesitate to reflect on all the things your dad(s) have done for you. And to all of you ladies whose parents may be going through a divorce or remarriage, stay positive because the future is very bright when you’ve got two dads to show you the light.

Photo From: Gossip Girl Season 5: Episode 13



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