The holidays are arguably the best time of the year. After all, during the holiday season, we show each other extra kindness, give gifts, and spend time with those we care about.
But some people find the holiday season to be the most stressful, heartbreaking time of the year because they can’t celebrate with their loved ones.
Seriously, what happens if someone you love is no longer here to celebrate the holidays with you?
I love this time of year because it’s family-oriented. During the holiday season, I typically make plenty of memories with my family. But when my dad passed, I didn’t realize how difficult this time of year would become.
I miss my dad every day. In fact, there’s not a day that goes by without me thinking of him. This time of year, though, it’s even more difficult than usual to be without my dad. The pain that I feel is indescribable. The empty seat at the table, the gift that I no longer buy, and the stocking I no longer stuff makes this time so hard. I miss my dad when my family participates in our yearly traditions. My heart breaks a little more each time I think about him.
Although we trust that our lost loved ones are in a better place, we still feel the grief. We miss them all year, and we’re tired of living without them. Is it too much to want our family and friends back, to feel their presence, and to have them here to celebrate?
My dad wouldn’t want me to be this upset about the fact that he’s gone, so I try to put on a brave face. But sometimes, I really can’t decide whether I should express my feelings and cry or smile through the tears instead.
I see friends posting family pictures on social media. Everyone seems to be enjoying themselves. However, when I see these photos, I can’t help but feel jealousy and sorrow. I actually think this is when I miss my dad the most because I physically see friends enjoying time with someone who I no longer have. In these moments, I wish that I could spend just one extra minute with my dad.
To the ones we’ve lost, I wish I could fully explain how much we all miss you.
We tell stories and relive traditions to keep your memories alive. However, we’d do anything to have you here to celebrate with us. To hear you tell your stories, to see the smile on your faces when we open our gifts, to sit with you and cherish the time that we have together.
We know that you’re gone, but you haven’t disappeared from our lives. In fact, we hold your memories close to our hearts. We celebrate your lives every single day, and we’ll continue to do so forever. But that still doesn’t make this time of year any less difficult for us.
The true meaning of the holidays isn’t the presents, the parties, or the food. It’s spending time with the people you love. Cherish the moments you have with your loved ones and hold onto them tightly because one day, you’ll realize how important they are to you.
Photo by S&B Vonlanthen on Unsplash