Women find great pleasure in scolding their men: They’ll say “he does nothing at home,” “he doesn’t help with children,” “marrying him was a mistake,” and so on. A woman should inspire a man’s feats both big and small. She should be able to motivate him in everything he does.
Every person likes being praised and receive compliments. It makes you feel like you are being appreciated, and thus, you strive to accomplish even bigger things. You are pleased when he praises the food you’ve cooked or the quality of the work that you’ve done. Men constantly praise us on our looks. And you praise children, regardless of gender and age, for their success and achievements.
So why do you need to make an exception for your man, especially if you want him to pay more attention and care to you?
How did you feel as a child when you were scolded for disobedience or bad behavior? You did not consider yourself guilty; you did the same things again and again. A man is in many ways a big child; he won’t appreciate being scolded. It could only make him more desperate and more frustrated in his ways.
You should begin to praise him and see how he changes. You will be surprised how there is so much energy and desire in him to help, change something, or even take care of children. Imagine a man preparing a delicious dinner for you when you return home. Sure, the kitchen will be in absolute chaos. But the main thing is that he cooked dinner. Praise him because he tried his best; he did all of it just for you. Don’t start with telling what a mess he made. The main thing is that it was done for your pleasure.
When you begin to praise your spouse, do it sincerely, without flattery, lies, and sarcasm. Your task is to give a compliment, approve the act, thank him and not scold him on his action. Men are vulnerable and emotional by nature; they are just good at hiding it. They subtly feel lies and flattery, and just because he isn’t crying, it doesn’t mean that he isn’t hurt.
You should follow these simple rules in order to elevate your relationship to a higher level.
1. You chose him
Always remember that you chose this man; you liked him the way he is. He was never the perfect person without flaws; neither were you. His shortcomings didn’t appear over time: they were already there. Either you did not want to notice them or began to perceive the behavior and actions of your spouse too painfully and irritably. Remember the beautiful romantic moments at the beginning of your relationship and the happiness you gave to each other and look at your man as you did before – through the eyes of a young, loving woman. You wanted to live together all your life, so take the first step towards its improvement.
2. Define the purpose of compliments
Why do you want to praise your man? Think carefully and determine your goal. It may be important for you to learn how to prevent conflicts or just feel his concern for you. Whatever your goal is, a beloved man deserves warm words and kind compliments from you.
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3. Show him that you need him
If you do everything yourself, without asking your spouse for help, then he himself would hardly guess that you need it. Show that his help is invaluable and that he means a lot to you. In return, there will be more trust in your relationship; it will be easier for you to know when you need each other’s help.
I am very familiar with the Russian culture, and let me tell you something, Russian women respect their men; they praise them like no other women in the world do. You should learn a thing or two from them.
4. Discuss tasks, not conditions
A man should understand what you want from him. Remember, men do not always recognize your hints, so speak bluntly about what needs to be done. Your words should be a request, not an order or a condition. Don’t ever threaten a man with something. You should ask nicely.
5. Praise and thank him
Every act of your chosen one, any manifestation of care and investment of energy and power must be gratefully appreciated and accepted by you. Do not expect that all requests will be fulfilled immediately; your husband needs time for the gradual or step-by-step fulfillment of your requests. For example, garage repairs are not done in one day, so do not talk about the annoying mess. Pay attention to what has already been done. And remember that there are no small matters that can be ignored – every little thing deserves your approval.
You chose to marry this man, and there’s no question about your love for him, or his for you. Don’t be afraid to show it for as long as you both live. He will compliment you in any way he can think of, but never forget to compliment him just the same.