20 Things You Should Have Learned By The Time You Hit 30

I’m a huge advocate for pushing yourself out of your comfort zone. By the time you hit 30, though, you should have your life (mostly) together and have worked out most of the kinks of “adulting.” Your twenties are the time to make mistakes and find your way in life, so what better time to stretch your limits? There are, however, many things you should learn and be comfortable doing by the time you turn 30. 

Here are 20 positive changes you should make in order to be comfortable with yourself by the time you turn 30.

1. Get Comfortable Saying “No”

The older you get, the more you need to be comfortable stating your limits and adhering to your values. When I was younger, I’d give people excuses to get out of the things I didn’t want to do. Now, I tell people I’d just rather stay at home, and there’s nothing wrong with saying “no” in a respectful but honest way.

2. Say “Bye” to Toxic Friendships

When you’re young, you measure your self-worth by how many friends you have. As you get older, though, you learn the beauty of having quality friendships instead of more “friendships.”

3. Make Decisions Mom Doesn’t Like

As long as you’re not making destructive decisions, it’s your prerogative to move away, take a job offer far away, elope, or quit your job to travel. It sounds harsh, but your parents have already lived through their twenties and made their most important choices. Now, it’s your turn to make the big decisions, and you need to realize that you shouldn’t always base your decisions on what will earn your family’s approval.

4. Find What Makes You Hot

Self-love is one of the most difficult things to achieve because we put lots of pressure on ourselves to fit into a “perfect” mold. Find parts of your body that make you unique. Identify your strengths. Embrace all that you are. In doing so, you’ll find what makes you beautiful… which is one of the most powerful things to do in your twenties.  

5. Learn From Criticism

When someone criticizes your behavior, listen. You may not always agree with their opinions, but in your twenties, you need realize the world doesn’t always see you the same way you see yourself. Be open to the realization that you may have hurt people or made mistakes. Welcome criticism as an opportunity for growth.

6. Own Your Mistakes

You will eventually f*ck up, and when you do, it’s important that you are brave enough to admit that you’ve made some poor choices. Owning your mistakes doesn’t mean that your actions weren’t justified. It just means that you are acknowledging that something you did or said negatively impacted someone else.

7. Learn When It’s Time to Say Goodbye

Whether it’s a toxic relationship or a job that doesn’t fulfill you, By the time you’re 30, you need to know when it’s time to call it quits, whether it’s in a toxic relationship or a job that doesn’t fulfill you. Learning to let go of the things in your life that no longer serve you well is vital to your mental health.

8. Find Out Where You Stand on Politics

Whether you identify as a Republican, a Democrat, or an Independent, it doesn’t matter where your loyalties fall. All that matters is that you’re informed, passionate, and willing to put your money where your mouth is. You want the world to change? Be the one to change it.

9. Figure Out Whether  You Want Kids

Regardless of whether or not you believe that someone has the right to ask you if you want to become a mom, understand that it’s a question everyone will ask you.You deserve to figure out the answer to that over-asked question for yourself, without basing your decision on what society believes you should do.

10. Be Yourself

Stay true to your style, aesthetic, and personality. These are unique traits that won’t change over time, so embrace them! Don’t try to conform; allow yourself to be bold and different.

11. Be Honest With Yourself

If you want to see your life end up the way you envision it, you must be honest with yourself. What are your goals? Are they realistic? Carving out reasonable dreams for your life is up to you.

12. Find Ways To Be Humble

Know the difference between being the smartest person in the room and being the most humble.  Because there is one, and you need to learn it.

13. Love Your Curves

It doesn’t matter if you are thin, thick, or somewhere in-between. Love who you are today because you’re perfect just the way you are.

14. Identify Your Worth

Don’t accept anything that doesn’t meet your standards or satisfy your needs. Don’t be someone who lays down and rolls over. Know what you deserve, and never settle for less.

15. Stand Up for Yourself

Always remember that people will treat you the way you feel you deserve. It’s important to learn how to stand up to others who treat you unfairly. It’s a skill everyone needs but few actually possess.

16. Make A Budget

If your twenties are about being frivolous, your thirties are about  being frugal. Learn how to live within your means and plan out what you can afford. It’s important to budget your money and teach yourself to stick to that budget.

17. Be Fearless

Be bold. Dare to try new projects or adventures. You may even discover that these new hobbies bring you more happiness than you ever thought they could.

18. Value Real Life

Don’t let social media bog you down so much that you forget what life looks like outside a Valencia filter. Embrace the tiny moments. Remain present. Enjoy every day.

19. Don’t Lust After Someone Else’s Life

You will eventually regret all the minutes you’ve wasted looking up to someone else’s happiness. There’s so much more to life than what you see others achieve. Maintain strong connections with those you love and know that your life is wonderful as it is.

20. Make One Goal for 30

Regardless of how impossible it may seem, remember that even the most successful people have built million-dollar empires that started out as glimmers in their eye. Nothing is impossible. Make plans, and dream big!

At the end of the day, growing up entails figuring out who you are and what you want out of your life. There is nothing in this world that is out of your reach, and once you make these small changes, you will realize that you’re already  well on your way to a successful life.

Feature Image by Gabriel Ecraela on Unsplash


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