Growing up, we’re given a lot of advice from a lot of different people. Our parents, our grandparents, our older siblings, and sometimes even strangers think they know what’s good for us. It just so happens that growing up, we don’t listen to most of the advice we’re given. As we do get older, we realize how valuable some of the advice and lessons we’ve received are. It takes a while to realize, but, when we finally do–we’re grateful. BuzzFeed asked their users to share the best piece of advice they’ve ever received from another woman and you’ll want to write some of these down.
“Shit on it.” This means that whatever it is, it’s generally not a major deal in the scheme of things and just forget it. Screw it.
One of my first jobs was at a cookie bakery. On the first day my supervisor told me, “You WILL burn the cookies. You’ll undercook them. You will bake too many. You won’t bake enough- And it’s going to be okay.” As someone who is constantly worried that I’m not good enough or messing everything up, now when I make a mistake I remind myself, “I burned the cookies. But it’s going to be okay.”
“Listen to everyone, trust no one” was the advice my grandma gave me before I started traveling internationally. Some of the best advice I’ve ever gotten.
My mom gave me two solid pieces of advice. The first has for some reason been passed down between women in my family for generations: ‘Always wash your unders.’ Basically if you ever can’t take a shower but feel dirty, wash (or at least splash with water) your pits, crotch, and behind your knees and you’ll feel way better.
The second my mom learned from marrying the poorest guy she ever dated: ‘money isn’t everything, but it helps.’
Having a baby with someone won’t fix a bad relationship.
“Listen to what your brain tells you instead of following your heart because your heart will eventually follow.” -My coworker told me this when I was contemplating moving across the state to be with my boyfriend or ending the relationship for my career.
I have very bad anxiety/depression issues, and I have always been very insecure about my body. One of my best friends told me to stand in front of a mirror naked and say something nice about yourself. Whether it’s about your looks, or your personality, your work integrity, anything, just something nice. It really does work! It helps with body positivity and also my anxiety.
My aunt always told me, “you don’t want a nice guy, you want a good guy. Nice guys are whiny and constantly need you to take care of them, but good guys can take care of themselves while loving and supporting you.”
“When you fal,l laugh off the pain. Save your tears for when I die.” I did grams!
My former neighbor who passed away in 2011 told me that no matter who it was, if it’s someone’s birthday give them flowers and you’ll have many friends.
Always be punctual. Showing a person that you respect his/her time shows that you respect that person in general.
“We are what we pretend to be.”
Pretend to be a kind, confident, in control person – the world will catch up. Pretend that you’re going to fail everything you do – you will.
My mom. Still trying to pretend what I want, but she was on the money.
Don’t wait until you hate him to leave.
I’ve been trying to reserve my “sorry”s for when it’s truly necessary and I truly mean it. She’s right, women are all too often apologizing because we need to be more polite than anyone else. It’s time to stop being sorry.
I was at a support group and a woman said, “Why do I rent out spaces of my heart to people that aren’t here anymore?” As a child I was molested and developed unhealthy relationships as a result. It inspired me to get help and focus on healing.
“You can sit on your pity potty for as long as you want—- but always flush when you get up” —my lovely English teacher (who originally heard it from her grandmother)
My mother is a wise woman indeed. Her best advice she ever gave me with regards to relationships was and still is “never settle” two simple words that mean so much. Never settle for being with someone just so you aren’t alone. Never settle for just average. Never settle for anything less than what you deem perfect for you.
Ain’t none of us know what we’re doing. The decision is the hardest part, and you’ll figure it out on the fly like the rest of us. Leave logic at the door and go with your heart.
My mom always says the Bible never said anything about being someone’s doormat. A.k.a respect the Golden Rule but know how to stick up for and advocate for yourself!
My favorite teacher in high school, Mrs. Cobb, told us “Get used to being alone.” It sounds harsh, but she didn’t say it to be mean or shady! She explained that there were going to be times in our lives where we didn’t have parents, friends, or lovers to guide us or shelter us. We had to learn to enjoy and love ourselves fully as individuals in order to lead fulfilling and meaningful lives. I’ve remembered that lesson of hers far longer than her Spanish lessons!
If there’s something that can be done in the moment, like pulling up the slip of a skirt, removing spinach from teeth, or fixing a lipstick smear then absolutely tell them, regardless of how well you know the person. If a kind stranger stops me from walking around with horrendously smeared lipstick, then bless them.
If there’s nothing to be done (like a shirt stain that has set), don’t frazzle someone unnecessarily. They’ll just stress about it.
No matter how well you know someone, if something can be fixed, then tell them! Girls gotta look out for each other!
My mom says you should always be able to make and manage your own money – it’s the key to independence. Even if you’re married and share financial responsibilities, you should be able to stand on your own two feet if you need to. Women have been kept down, and kept in bad relationships, for centuries because of their financial dependence on men.
If there’s anything I know about being a woman, it’s that we all need to be kind to each other, men too. There is no limit on kindness. Please be sure to watch over your own actions and be kind, always.
Originally published on Pizzabottle