Stop Shaming: Why Hookup Culture Isn’t Really That Bad

For as long as I can remember, girls have been judged so hard for wanting to hook up. If a boy “gets some”, he’s fist-bumped by his friends…if a girl does, she’s a slut. If a girl flirts with or talks to multiple guys, she’s a hoe…if a guy does he’s just a player. Girls judge one another for hooking up with guys and yet most of us do it. Guys encourage one another to hook up with as many girls as possible. We, as women, have been aware of this double standard for years and yet we still do nothing to change it. Why?

This needs to change, pronto

Hookup culture is not an issue. No one should be judged for being sexually active, just like no one should be judged for not being sexually active. Do whatever you want with your life. It’s 2016 and people still treat sex like it’s a totally taboo subject. Sex can be an awesome, great thing if you do it wisely. Be safe and be responsible…and don’t ever feel like you have to do anything that you aren’t comfortable with.

What so many people fail to see is how freeing the hookup culture truly is. Free of the obligations and responsibilities that come with being in a steady relationship. Have fun, explore your desires, and figure out what you like and what you don’t like. Take home that hot guy at the bar, just because you want to. Who cares if you don’t ever see him again? Do what you want because you want to.

Being young, independent and single is practically a super power.

The notion that you have to be in a relationship to have sex is totally old school. There is absolutely nothing wrong with casual sex, one-night stands, or having a go-to hook-up that you call when you’re in the mood. There’s also nothing wrong with being in a relationship. Do whatever it is that you want to do and forget the rest.

The stigma surrounding hookup culture comes from the fact that sometimes people are idiots. If you’re adult enough to have sex, you should also be enough of an adult to do it safely. If you don’t want to get pregnant, use protection. If you want to protect yourself against disease, use protection. Get regular check-ups and know your body. When people choose to not do these things, sex gets a bad name. Sex isn’t the problem; it’s how you use it.

Hookup culture isn’t the issue with society.

The issue is people constantly judging one another. Just because you choose to live your life in a certain manner doesn’t mean that everyone else should do the same. It also doesn’t mean that you’re wrong. Ninety percent of the world’s issues could be solved if we all agreed to stop judging one another and start respecting the choices of others.

We’re surrounded by judgment in this crazy world, and the last thing any of us need, as women, is more judgment. Let’s start supporting each other. Not only as women, but as a society. So let’s end it…and let’s start with hookup culture. Let us accept as a society that sex is sex…and that’s it pretty freaking awesome. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to have sex. So let’s detach the stigma from the word and let sex just be sex… And forget about the rest.

Featured image via Leah Kelley on Pexels


  1. Guys will sleep with loose women who participate in hookup culture. But will they seriously date or marry them?! LOL

    High quality men will rarely settle for those same women, and will instead choose the chaste, young, traditional/family minded woman, who has not acquired all the baggage that comes with multiple low-quality ‘hook ups’. Men don’t value a woman’s ability to ‘act like a man’ ….. similar to how women don’t typically value men who act prissy and ‘girly’.

    Sorry to burst your bubble, but it makes no sense for a man to put so much at risk, for such a poor return on investment. If a woman wants a high quality man, she should lead by example and be a high quality woman (I mean by traditional standards, none of this silly ‘YASSSSSS KWEEEEEN SLAAAAAAY’ trash).

    Also, if you’re still reading this comment, the slut/stud dichotomy isn’t a DOUBLE standard, it’s the SAME standard. It’s just that men and women are different. Keys and locks are different too. We don’t celebrate a lock that opens for every key, that’s a broken lock. We don’t celebrate a key that can’t open anything, that’s a defective key. We celebrate locks that are secure, since exclusivity is the goal of a lock. We celebrate keys that open many doors, since access is the goal of a good key.

  2. The double standard is based on rediculous assumptions, one of them being a woman has value only by patriarchal standards which views women as a prize not a full sexual being Women are to be for male use as in baby machine or sex machine with no concern for her pleasure

    The double standard must die


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