Three years ago, I felt like I was living on a different planet. My inner world changed, I entered a conflict, and I hurt someone in ways that I regret.
To the person I hurt, I I’m sorry for the way I treated you.
We were in the same space, trying to navigate a difficult situation. The others around us didn’t quite understand us, nor did they give us the space that we needed.
When I stepped into the situation, I didn’t quite understand what to do. I was young, and I didn’t know better. I’d never been in similar spaces before, and because of my inexperience, I made bad decisions.
I thought that everyone was an ally. I thought that everyone would come together and fight through any difficulty that we faced.But unfortunately, my hopes didn’t match my experience.
Eventually, I realized that I was caught in someone else’s act. They told me secrets that seemed so convincing that they felt like facts. Soon, they began spilling secrets about everyone, and I believed every word. That is, until you came into the picture.
Whenever I had a problem, you guided me through it. And when you sensed that I was in danger, you immediately helped me. In a world where everyone was told to look out for themselves first, that was the last thing that I expected.
At the time, I didn’t realize how grateful I felt for all of your help. My life was unstable, and I just wanted to survive my young adult years. So much happened in my life that I easily became frustrated and drained. Sometimes I took out my frustration on you, even though you didn’t deserve it.
Whenever you held me accountable, I lashed out.
I needed clarity on why you acted the way that you did, so I asked the people around us. But instead of defending you, they continued their charade, trying to make themselves look like the heroes.
Before I knew it, you were gone, and I realized how much I hurt you. It was too late to tell you how much I appreciated you and apologize for damaging our friendship.
Now that we’re both in a different life stage, I want to tell you how sorry I am for the way that I treated you years ago. I’m sorry for how disrespectful I was towards you. And I’m sorry that I believed the others instead of trusting you. They were wrong, and you were always right.
I wish that I stood up for you. I wish I didn’t let the rumors get the best of me. I stooped low enough to believe gossip over listening to you, and for that, I’m sorry..
The situation felt like a losing battle for me, but I wish I had stepped outside of myself and helped you win. I put you in a lose-lose situation, and our friendship didn’t survive the battle. I’m sorry for the hurtful things that I said and did. I wish that I could turn back time and help you triumph over everyone who hurt you.
Photo by Sayo Garcia on Unsplash
