As a child, I never fully grasped the concept of the “white” black girl. However, I am more aware of what people say to me now as an adult.
In my younger days, I often questioned how a black girl should act and how society viewed her. I grew up in a small, mostly white town, so my friends were mostly white. I’ve always been around people of a different race, but I never felt any difference between us.
I never saw the difference until I heard the remarks others would make as I slowly became more aware of the racial divide around me.
As I grew older, I would hear the comments from “friends.” They would say things like, “You’re not like them, you speak so proper,” “You’re white in a black girls’ body,” or “You’re an Oreo.” Back then I would just brush it off and laugh because I did not know what to say about these comments that were merely based on the color of my skin. But, now it makes me upset that I didn’t speak up about how uncomfortable those comments made me feel.
At first, I didn’t let those comments bother me because I never paid attention. I was always just being me.
Although I never really had any racist comments directly said about me, I have heard people around me make sly negative remarks about black people. However, people quickly turn to me and say, “Well not you, you’re different.” This phrase never really cleared the air with me because, if we look at the underlying surface, I am black. I have heard these statements my entire life, and I am sure I will continue to hear them for years to come.
I understand now being an adult, people are not aware of what they’re saying and how it can affect someone. Based on my experience, I want others to know that no matter what size, shape, or skin color you are, do not let people get away with remarks that make you feel uncomfortable. I was never wanting to fit in with anyone.
Because I do not fit into a stereotype, people label me the “white” black girl. But, in reality, I have never tried to be anyone else but me.
I am who I am because that is how I was raised to be. I’m not who I am because I want to fit into the daily norm of society. I am a black girl who is living my life as me.