We all know that to avoid spending any more time with people than is necessary, introverts do some pretty weird things. It’s not because they’re mean, though. Unlike extroverts, introverts feel drained when they have to interact with others. Many introverts would rather spend more time alone to pursue their passions or simply rest than chat it up at a networking event or a party.
However, there’s a rare breed of introverts that even other introverts probably find bizarre: extreme introverts. Extreme introverts work harder than anyone else to maximize the time they have to themselves. They don’t isolate because they’re sad or pissed off – it’s just how they operate.
So, here are 13 weird things that only extreme introverts can relate to:
1. Before interviews, they put their stalker mode on overdrive.
Whenever extreme introverts have an upcoming interview, they LinkedIn- and Facebook-stalk as many people at the company as they can. That way, they can figure out what their interviewers’ interests are way ahead of time. They want to talk about themselves in a way that signals that they’ve done their “research!”
2. They’re insanely patient with fast food drive-thrus.
No matter how ridiculously long a fast food drive-thru is, extreme introverts would be willing to wait in it forever. Anything to avoid one-on-one interactions inside!
3. They don’t even bother with small talk.
I mean, awkward silence is less awkward than talking for the millionth time about how it’s going to rain, right? At least extreme introverts don’t pretend to be all buddy-buddy over something as trivial as the weather.
4. They feel content with staying in for a whole month.
Somehow, they are naturally immune to cabin fever. Given the choice, they would happily stay “home sweet home” for the rest of their lives.
5. They haven’t been to parties or big events in years.
Hardcore introverts can’t even remember the last time they went out to celebrate someone else’s birthday. It’s just not something that brings them enjoyment, like it does for other people.
6. They keep secrets even from people closest to them.
Ultimately, extreme introverts are their own best friends. They’re so secretive that they can’t even confide in their own computer or diary.
7. They never say a single word in conversations.
Even though they don’t speak up, extreme introverts have a lot to say. But instead of talking everything out, they often prefer writing it all down and carefully thinking through it.
8. Even their online conversations are brief.
After chatting online and hearing nothing back, most people assume that their extreme introvert friends have fallen off the face of the earth. But they haven’t. They just want to be alone, and they don’t see any use in justifying their need to recharge.
9. They order at least half of their groceries online.
An introvert’s dream come true: drones that fly overhead and deliver all the food they need. For now, though, ordering groceries online is good enough.
10. And they hate grocery stores with a passion.
They can miraculously get by without setting foot in a grocery store for at least a month. There are just too many people there.
11. Their idea of fun is sitting still for hours.
Resting at home entertains them more than going out ever could.
12. They leave without giving excuses.
Extreme introverts come and go whenever they please – no excuses necessary. While less extreme introverts make up excuses for why they have to leave, these badasses are above excuses and just leave whenever they feel like it (but only when it’s appropriate, of course).
13. They never answer their phones.
They really, really hate phone calls with a passion. They always tell others to email them or text them if something urgent should arise. If you call them, they won’t answer, so get used to your calls going to voicemail!
If your extremely introverted friends seem to have gone AWOL, don’t fret. They’re just recuperating from overwhelming stimulation of the outer world. Their need to refresh doesn’t mean that they don’t love you, though. Extreme introverts simply need plenty of self-care and alone time to be their best selves. Give them time and space, and they’ll show up for you like you show up for them.