Everyone’s had them; those awful days where nothing is going right and all you want to do is curl up in your bed and cry. It’s hard to put on a smile and a brave face in front of everyone and pretend it is all okay, when you know deep down it’s not even close to okay. You are going to be disappointed at times when things didn’t go your way. What that person said about you will hurt. That grade? Yeah, that’s pretty shitty. Or when you know you could have done better, but you didn’t, for what ever reason. Unfortunately, the truth is, it happens.
And while it didn’t go your way, and you’re upset, trying hard not to ruin your makeup, your tears are inevitable. Disappointment is one of the awful things that happen completely out of our control, but it is so necessary. At the end of it all, disappointment is what is going to make you stronger. I have had those days where Legally Blonde, ice cream, and crying were my best friends. But I learned each time it has happened that it was a perfectly un-perfect reality check. Those days taught me what I needed to remind myself of and what I was really trying to accomplish. Here’s my advice to you, for days when you’re disappointed, but not yet defeated:
1. Don’t put pressure on the little things. Some things in life are beyond your control. Whatever happens, happens. So go day by day and see what a new sunrise has to offer.
2. Focus on one thing at a time. Prioritize what needs to get done. My dad reminds me this every time I get stressed, that nothing get can done if you think of a million other thoughts; overwhelming yourself with to-dos will only set you up for disappointment. Take a deep breath, and just start somewhere.
3. Have me time. Everyday. Paint your nails that color you have been dying to try. Take a shower and use that amazing body scrub, watch your favorite movie, call your mom. Do what is doing to make you happy and not think about everything else on your mind.
4. Don’t be negative. You can’t control every situation that you are dealt. Find the positives and grow them over all the negativities you’re facing. Learn to understand yourself and your trials, and let go of what you can’t change. You did your best and because of that you didn’t fail.
5. Eat cake. Trust me it won’t hurt you and staring at it won’t make you taste it any more. Indulge, because you deserve it.
6. Go outside. Go to the gym, take a walk; just breathe fresh air and don’t touch a phone or a textbook. Take time to focus on yourself physically and acknowledge your thoughts.
7. Be independent. Do your own thing and at your own pace. Do what makes you happy and don’t sacrifice your independence for anything or anyone.
8. Let go of what won’t matter tomorrow. These things are insignificant. They have a tiny place in your heart to worry about so don’t let it take up more space than it deserves.
9. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. Know your limits, and know your resources. Call your best friend and ask for advice or visit your professor. But don’t let your pride get in the way of receiving help and doing better next time.
10. Go to bed happy each night. If something is wrong or upsetting you, don’t let it go; address the issue and know you did all you could for yourself. Know you did what you could today and that was enough. Tomorrow brings new sunrise and a whole new adventure.
You are still going to have those days. But recognize it is nothing more than just one day. 24 hours, 1440 minutes. Make each minute tomorrow count. Know that how you’re feeling is okay, cry if you need too and even scream when it’s time to. Take your time, but don’t take too long. Pick yourself up, wipe your tears away, and know you are perfect, regardless of that awful, disappointing moment. Because all it really is, is a moment.