To every former teacher, manager, supervisor, friend, acquaintance, and classmate: I’m sorry our end had to come to this. I didn’t want to leave you and step out the way I did. I really wish we had ended our salutations differently. Because I know I will miss you after our goodbye.
Regardless of how bad the memories were, I miss the good times that happened. The times when we went out for bubble tea, food, and snacks will always be on my mind. Whenever I go and order bubble tea now, I think back to those times and remember how fun they were.
I miss our short-lived camaraderie. We told each other funny stories, shared inside jokes, and hugged whenever we felt sad. Those moments were wholesome; they made me feel like I could conquer the world and express my emotions. Thanks to you, I’ve never felt so included and accepted before in my life.
The feelings of joy could never be replaced. The trips we went on have impacted who I am for a lifetime. And the lessons I’ve learned are stories that can never be erased.
For many of you, the goodbye came way too soon.
I wasn’t ready to say farewell because I knew I’d miss the fun memories we created. I wanted to continue experiencing the joy I once felt from all of you. So, I wanted to hold onto our relationship or friendship for as long as possible.
But unfortunately, life pulled us apart.
We realized we all had different obligations and priorities. Some of us had different values, which were often contradictory. This became emotionally draining for many of us. So, instead of holding on, we decided to let go.
We thought that this goodbye could amend our mistakes.
Unfortunately, nothing can be a solution unless we understand and communicate with each other. But we needed more time to do what was best for us. So communication between us rarely happened.
Then we drifted apart.
The halt in communication created a wrench in our relationship. It was an unexplainable pain: something that we never expected to happen.
So to whoever has left in my life, I think about you as you traverse my mind. I think about the impacts you’ve made and laugh at your jokes. I also sometimes wish to travel back in time to relive these memories because I want to hold them in my heart for as long as possible.
Leaving someone isn’t easy, especially if you’re unprepared. So, to whoever I have left, please accept my apology for leaving unexpectedly. Sometimes, I wish I was more patient in creating better memories. And often, I wish we could’ve hugged each other goodbye differently.
But that being said, everything has a beginning and an end. So when it comes to an end, it’s just best to accept it and end the chapter with whatever memories you have.
Featured image via Allef Vinicius on Unsplash
