If you had a dollar for every time you’ve been asked why you were single, that dream wedding you plan and tag on Pinterest would surely be paid for by now. You’re still young, so you don’t see the point in being in a relationship right now, but you can’t help but wonder what it would be like to have a little more consistency in your life.
I see the way you hesitate to open yourself up to anyone who dares try to tempt you with their lines and make you vulnerable. You’ve been naïve before and will be damned if you don’t protect your heart at all costs this time around. I also see the way you watch with wondering eyes the couples that have made it work, and you question how that type of loyalty must feel. But I still don’t blame you for running for the hills the moment a seemingly nice person tries to get to know you.
People will throw their cliche lines at you and tell you how you are the most beautiful girl they have ever laid eyes on, and you will respond with nothing more than an eye roll. You haven’t completely given up on relationships just yet, but you do try to avoid getting anywhere past a third date with someone, looking for any excuse to end things. They were too clingy, although they only asked you how your day was going 4 times a week. You will repeatedly say they were just using lines, despite you smiling at every word. You run at the first sign of commitment because you honestly don’t know what you will do if this is real. If someone could be honest and loyal to you, you wouldn’t have a clue what to do, and that’s the kind of uncertainty you don’t care to play with.
You are single and taking care of yourself, but you can’t keep expecting to find someone to spend more than just nights with if you aren’t giving them the chance to stay. You are setting yourself up for failure every time you start looking for issues before they even have a chance to begin to unfold.
I want you to take a deep breath the next time you are asked on a date. They want to take you out in public. They want to spend some time with you. They are making an effort and putting themselves out there. If you feel anything, take the leap.
Risk your heart and feelings one more time, and then do it once more.
You are human and you will fall. People will continue to disappoint you, but you cannot keep letting someone else’s mistakes impact your future happiness. Just because people leave doesn’t mean that everyone will come with a suitcase they never intend to unpack. Someone will leave a toothbrush at your place, clothes on your floor, and peace in your mind.
Featured image via Genessa Panainte on Unsplash