5 Ways To Feel In Control Without Being Controlling

Life can throw us lots of curveballs. It is easy for us to feel like many things are out of our control. This can lead to us wanting a stronger grip on what we feel we can control. 

However, there is a fine line between feeling in control (of our thoughts, actions, decisions) and coming off as controlling. Here are five tips for finding the balance.

1. Regularly Check In with Yourself

When we take time to reflect inward, we naturally are more pleasant outwardly. Everyone has different ways to feel centered whether that be journaling, meditating, napping, or finding a quiet place to reflect. This should be scheduled into our week like every other task at hand. Our mental wellness is just as important as physical health. An article by Helena Woods mentions, 

“Being a witness to your mind rather than being directly in the emotions and thoughts is a great way to practice mindfulness and find healing and peace within.”

2. Think Before You Speak

When you find yourself in moments of conflict, it is okay to ask for some time and space before reacting. Many times when we find ourselves in an argument, we tend to be going off of emotion rather than logic. This is when we can have stronger emotions and be less intentional with our words. 

Physically removing yourself from the space and taking time to truly assess your feelings on the situation will prove more beneficial in the long run. 

3. Let Go!

Even if something may not seem to bother you at the moment, it can still be good to let yourself go from time to time. Blast your favorite song and dance like no one is watching (I love to do this with “Dancing On My Own” by Robyn). 

Cancel plans and binge-watch your favorite reality show. Take a bubble bath. Sometimes we don’t know our body and mind need that unwind time, yet we feel so much better once we do. 

4. Organize Your Space 

When we are in a clean space, it can naturally bring us more peace. Getting rid of your tangible junk can inspire you to get rid of your “mental junk” as well. I have noticed personally that when the space I’m in is clean, my mood is naturally better. Even if you don’t tackle your whole living space in one shot, small progress is still progress.

5. Sleep

There are so many benefits to a good night’s sleep. We’ve all been there when we’ve had a terrible night’s sleep and then everything the following day seems to be an insult to injury. 

Establish a sleep routine, going to bed and waking up at the same time every day. The last hour or so before bed, try to avoid any “blue light” (i.e. TV and phone).  Read a book, journal, or spend time with a loved one/pet instead. You will wake up the next day calmer and more rested. 

Life can be chaotic sometimes. It’s important for us to find control when we can while also being careful to not let it negatively impact our relationships. What do you do to feel more in control of your life? Let us know in the comments below!

Photo by Mathilde Langevin on Unsplash


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