Many of us do not realize how far gone they are until it’s “TOO late.” That can be extremely scary for our friends, family and ourselves and even fatal. Drinking is one of the leading causing of deaths in America. Girls, you go on a date with a super cute and dreamy guy and he asks you out to a bar for, of course, drinks and appetizers and before you know it, you are back at his place looking like a hot mess. It’s one thing to have 1-2 drinks and it’s another thing to become totally plastered. One is socially accepted and okay. Then there’s getting drunk on a date, which is honestly in my opinion, dumb.
Why is it so dumb? It’s because you open yourself up to more danger. It’s important to think about some things before drinking a few extra drinks. How well do you know this guy? How well do your friends know this guy? Does anyone know where and what you’re doing? And of course, how do you know he won’t slip something in your drink when you get up and use the ladies room?
In college, I didn’t have many friends, just like all the other years while in school. You know those rolling backpacks you usually get when you are like 5 years old? Well, picture someone in college using one walking around campus with it. Professors and students would mock me for using it. And when it came to guys and the dating world, it was a total “turn off.”
Fitting in was something I sort of craved. Being popular seemed like my only hope to be recognized. What does a girl do when she wants a lot of friends in college? She joins a sorority! Well in my case… That was such a mistake! The girls were horrible. I have never seen anything like it in my life. I continued to stay in for about 8 months even after I witnessed a girl sleeping with her best friend’s boyfriend and then telling me not to say a word or I’ll be out of the group. Talk about low. The girls in the sorority with me, I really could not trust.
Now, I can understand some of you feel the need to have a drink, “I’m just way too awkward sober…you don’t understand.” But I really do understand. I’m 26 years old. I graduated college less than 5 years ago. I get it and know what many of you are feeling. However, if the guy thinks less of you for only having one drink…so what? Will his opinion really matter next morning? Is that someone you really want to be with if they judge you over your choices, especially ones that involve your safety?
Personally, I don’t have the guy pick me up to go on a date for the first month. Maybe that’s weird or maybe that’s just me. It’s alright though, to set your own rules, limits, and safeguards.
Too many of the guys I have dated, in the past, would never have my full trust. The reason that was, was because they would end up drinking way too much on the date making me super uncomfortable when it was time to drive me home. After one too many dates like that, I decided to just opt out and avoid it all together. Why even put yourself in that situation if you already know the end result?
If you are in this situation here is what you can do to stay safe:
Make Sure Your Phone Has a Full Battery
Let at least 3 people you are close to knowing exactly where you are going, who you are meeting up with, and when you should be home. Have them send you a text at a certain time to check-in.
Have you ever lost your keys before? This app is perfect for those situations. You can attach the title ring to your keys and put another one on other valuable items, such as your car. Great app when you are drinking. Open up the app and you can locate your keys and car on a map. The tile will send a sound to help you find it.
Bring a Certain Amount of Cash You Want to Spend
Although there is a social view that he “should” offer to pay as it is a date, do not assume he will be paying your tab, too. I like to use cash when on a date with someone I don’t know well because you can leave the amount and go. There is no wait time like there would be if you paid with a credit card.
Make Sure You Bring a Credit/Debit Card
A car ride home (cab, uber, lift) will be much easier without cash. You want to make sure you have either a credit/debit card as this car service will not accept payment in the form of cash. Make sure you download the app and input your card number. P.S. Lift is way cheaper!
Call a Friend or Family Member to Come Get You
If you are having trouble downloading the app or do not have a credit/debit card on you…phone a friend!
Make Friends With The Police
The police will make sure you are safe in getting you to your destination.
The guy is coming on to you and making you feel “violated” whip out your spray and go for the eyes. Pepper spray is a good item you should carry with you whenever you go on a date. You can even get the kind that fit in a small wristlet, in the form of a ring and a necklace. It could save you if you are put in an uncomfortable or dangerous situation. On my first date with the guy I’m currently dating, (over a year) I remembered what dad always told me, “always make sure you have your pepper spray on you.” When I went to meet him for the first time, I was so nervous and freaking out. Behind my dress was a bottle of pepper spray in my right hand unlocked and ready to spray. Although he turned out amazing, “so far” you never want to take a chance. Always be protected!
Stay the Night
No, I’m not referring to staying the night at “his” place, no! Call up one of your girlfriends and crash at her place for the night. If she doesn’t pick up, get a hotel or Airbnb in a safe neighborhood for just one night. Look for a female host or a gay male.
Sleep in Your Car
You could do this as your “LAST RESORT OPTION.” The reason I say last resort is because it’s not really the choice you can do. It’s a bit dangerous for a single gal to do. I have never done it. But I have heard from friends that have. Word of advice, if you are not okay to drive, and you wish to sleep in your car, do not sleep in the driver’s seat. You can get arrested for “attempted to drive” even if you weren’t going to. They will arrest you and you could be faced with a DUI. Sleep in the back seat. Do not do this on the side of the highway!
Here is a Drinking a Driving PSA I created my senior year in college. Thank you to my father, Tony Mariano for shooting and editing the video.