The Real Reason Why Women Lose Interest After The Chase

“The thrill of the chase,” seems to be the anthem of Generation Y. If it wasn’t for “YOLO,” it may have even had a going shot at being the motto. Gone are the days of simply getting asked out on a date “j​ust because.”​ We don’t just date. We talk, we text, we hook up, text some more, drunkenly have sex a handful of times, and t​hen w​e date. Too often we find ourselves caught up in these relationships that aren’t classified as actual relationships. We become in complete and utter denial of any feelings we may have “caught.” God forbid we actually show genuine affection towards another human being. That’s just nonsense.

We have always been told to chase after our dreams. We’ve been taught that if we chase after our hearts’ deepest aspirations then success is inevitable. Despite our most futile attempts at achievement, it seems to be a rarity that our visions ever become a reality. Perhaps the real problem lies in the fact that we are blissfully unaware of our own true desires.

We all remember the way our hearts fluttered on the magical morning of Christmas upon receiving that one special gift from Santa. What we may not recall is that most of us forgot about that present a week or so later. That is, until a so called “friend” came over and noticed it, sometimes even dared to play with it. It was then and only then that we swiftly remembered why we needed t​hat toy so desperately in the first place.

As we get older, the unique qualities of all those gifts seem increasingly less important, and what we really desire cannot be provided to us monetarily. What hasn’t changed, unfortunately, is the way we value what is important to us. So much emphasis is placed on what we want, and not early enough on what we have.

It’s no wonder that we also tend to lose interest romantically once the “chase” is over.​ One of the most intriguing aspects of finding a new object of affection is the personal challenge of whether or not you can actually gain their attention. Sometimes, just like with how we feigned upon our coveted toys, it requires another girl posing a threat before we recognize the worth of what we have. “The thrill of the chase,” is only fun when it’s something worth chasing and if the chase doesn’t last forever.

The REAL reason why girls lose interest after the chase is simple. We want what we can’t have. And don’t it always seem to go, “that you don’t know what you’ve got till it’s gone.” Striving for the unattainable can be dangerous, but it’s a risk we often take despite the potential heartache.

Before I am convicted of giving us ladies an entirely bad name, let it be known that this disposition is partly due to the behaviors of guys. Constantly, we hear men moan and complain about how “nice guys finish last”, but forgive us if our definition of “nice” doesn’t equal you incessantly texting us, obsessing over our every move, and just being plain c​reepy. A​cting like that will earn you a one-way ticket to the friend-zone. If you’re not sensing even the slightest bit of reciprocation, chances are, s​he’s just not that into you.

Curiosity and mystery go hand-in-hand, and nothing is sexier than a good old-fashioned mystery. So, guys, if you want to keep us interested, you have to keep it fresh, exciting, spontaneous, and even unpredictable. Of course, ask any r​eal life g​irl the validity of that statement and she will deny it to her grave.

However, if you make us run a marathon for you, chances are that by the time you’re finally done running away, we’ll already be chasing someone else.

Happy chasing.

Featured Image via He’s Just Not That Into You


  1. Women should accept the fact that they are insecure about themselves for no logical reason and will never have validoty as to why they feel the need to chase the unattainable. You do want us to watch over you. Thats why so many women love the notebook. Choke on it ladies

      • No, he’s a man, and has been trying to date women for years. That’s why he knows what he’s talking about. He’s not a pig at all, just telling the truth. A woman couldn’t find a good man with both hands and a flashlight.

  2. Okay. This makes a lot of sense to me. But I want to know how to stop being this way. I want to be with a guy but I continue to flirt with other guys. I feel like I can’t commit to one guy because I like to flirt and be with other guys as well. I know I should just not be in a relationship, but I don’t want to keep being this way. I just can’t keep the interest.

  3. Its just this over indulgent society we live in. Everyone wants more, more,and more of anything and everything. Women have so many options so it’s no surprise that they can’t settle on one. They want more. I cant really blame yall either.If i had an unlimited supply of women i would probably be confused all the time too.

  4. And women wonder why we won’t commit…smh as soon as we do they get bored because there’s no more chase. It’s ironic really that women want to be lead in circles by a man who’s unattainable but always want a long term commitment at the same time


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