The BF Dilemma: Struggling To Balance A Best Friend And A Boyfriend

Entering a new relationship is exciting, scary, and invigorating, all at once. Finally finding someone you really like and enjoy spending time with is challenging, and has been a feat that nearly every girl on the planet constantly struggles to achieve. However, even if you are one of the lucky ones to have snagged up her very own Prince Charming, it’s incredibly easy to get wrapped up in the fairy tale of it all, leaving parts of your old, single girl swag world behind.

Although this new world of dinner dates and snuggle sessions is great, it is also important to take the time to keep up relationships and friendships with everyone from your single days. For instance, even though the dynamics within your friend group may have changed since you first entered the relationship, it is crucial to remember that, amidst the broken hearts and bad first dates, your friends have always been there, and will continue to always be there for you.

Still, splitting time between your BFFs and your BF is tricky, especially if all of your friends are single and don’t necessarily understand the new obligations you have with your boy. So how can we make finding balance between our friends and our boyfriend easier?

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Communication. Listening to both the BFFs and the BF is necessary in order to maintain a healthy balance. For instance, ask your friend how her day has been going or offer advice if she needs to vent about something that has been bugging her. Even though you are in a relationship, and have most likely discussed all of your relationship drama with your girlfriends multiple times, being a good friend requires you to listen to what they have to say too.

If they are feeling left out or neglected it is important to make sure that they know you are still around to listen to their crazy drunken stories or embarrassing attempts to pick up that cutie you’ve both stalked at the gym. Likewise, talk to your boyfriend if you feel like you need to spend more time with the girls. Even better, explain that you want to share your time with both him and your friends so that everyone can get to know each other better. Go on group outings, invite him to your friends’ parties, schedule a couple double dates and boom: now your friends are his friends and hanging out all together just became 10x easier. Most likely, he’ll respect that you have your own life too and will find it sexy that you can hang out without spending all of your free time with him. After all, distance makes the heart grow fonder.

Managing time is often easier said than done. Yet, in order to avoid losing friends while in a relationship, the key is to constantly remind your BFFs that you care about keeping them in your life. Quite simply, your friends just want your genuine attention and for you to show them that you are there through thick and thin. If you have something planned with your boyfriend for that night, or vice versa, be honest and reschedule. They’ll appreciate your honesty in the long run and will respect that you were upfront about your time.

At the end of the day, you need your friends and they need you. Boyfriends are great but friends are forever. Keep that in mind and, with a little communication, splitting time between the BF and the BFF will be NP.

Featured Image by Boston College



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