Our insecurities can easily get the way of our shared happiness. No one wants to be that girlfriend that is glued to her phone because her man doesn’t trust her enough to go out without him.
There’s nothing like a girls’ night out to let some stress go. Everyone needs space and alone time to let loose and reset the clock.
According to the HuffingtonPost, “Jealousy arises when you are fearful of losing a relationship you value. It is among the most human of all emotions, yet it can destroy the foundation on which healthy connections are formed.”
It’s important to distinguish the difference between jealousy and FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out) when it comes to your lady having a Girls’ Night Out (GNO).
If you get angry at your girlfriend for wanting to spend time with her girlfriends instead of you, take a seat and reassess the terms of your relationship. You don’t own her.
But alternatively, if you feel left out because she isn’t spending enough time with you, that’s completely valid. It’s natural to want to be included, especially if it’s in the life of someone you care deeply about. But space is one of the healthiest gifts you can give your partner. And if she wants to take time to shake it on the dance floor and pound back green tea shots with her squad, that’s her prerogative.
Many often see going out without your boyfriend as a bad thing because of the potential of another man swooping in to steal your girl. But if your foundation of trust is 100% rooted in each other, this won’t even be a concern.
In fact, being totally cool with your girl spending time without you is actually beneficial to the relationship. A 2017 study by the University of Texas found that “having a satisfying social network buffers spouses from the harmful physiological effects of everyday marital conflicts.” Although you may want it to be true, you can’t satisfy your partner’s every social need. Diversity and moderation is the key to happiness!
Here are some reasons why a woman enjoying a girls’ night out without her man is a good thing.
1. It makes her healthier!
A study by the University of Oxford found that when women engage in certain activities with other women, such as “drinking beer, gossiping, and talking about their rivals (preferred topic),” they are more likely to “socialize, drink and laugh together.” In turn, these behaviors improve women’s health by speeding up the recovery time from illness, “building a stronger immune system, decreasing anxiety levels, and increasing generosity levels.”
2. Distance makes the heart grow fonder.
It’s an old saying for a reason! When you spend time away from your girlfriend, there are benefits for both parties. She will be thinking about you while she’s away, which will make the reunion all the better! Like Ari Grande says, “I can’t really miss you if I’m with you, and when I miss you it’ll change the way I kiss you.” Keep the spark in the relationship by allowing yourselves to be apart from each other.
3. She can unload her anxiety on someone else.
Naturally, if you are with her, you love her endlessly. But everyone needs a break from others’ stress and anxiety sometimes. Her feelings are 100% valid, but they don’t always have to be a shared experience for your own mental health. When she can confide in her friends, it alleviates some of the load from you. And no offense, but she’ll probably get more satisfying advice from her gossip circle than from your couch.
4. She’s having fun!
If it is true love, you will find personal happiness in the happiness of the ones you love. Your lady is always destined to have a total blast when she’s out with her girls. They’ll be shotgunning Whiteclaws, screaming “Truth Hurts” by Lizzo, and stumbling over to the closest 24-hour pizza joint in total satisfaction. Sure, you could have tagged along, but the lyrics, “Why are men great ‘till they gotta be great,” just don’t hit home if her boyfriend is singing them too.
5. You get a night to hit the town with the boys!
Just because your partner is going out doesn’t mean that you have to sit alone at home and pout. You can turn the TV off of Bachelor in Paradise reruns, change out of your weekend sweats, and grab a 12-pack to smash with the boys. And honestly, it’s probably overdue. A research project led by Robin Dunbar, head of the Institute of Cognitive and Evolutionary Anthropology at Oxford University, discovered that the average man in a new relationship loses two close friends in the process.
Originally written by Madison Kerth on YourTango
Feature Image by Polina Tankilevitch on Pexels