To The One Who Forever Changed Me

mother-child-changed

My life changed forever, in so many ways, when you entered my world. I can try to sum it all up in words, but I doubt words could do justice to what you have done to change who I am. I’m going to try anyway.

I want to be more because of you. 

When you came into my life I was in my mid-twenties and thought myself fairly set in my ways. I had created a life I was happy with, one I felt I would be comfortable with for the rest of my days. That changed when you entered my life. 

I took charge of my health primarily because I want to be better for you, both physically and mentally. I want to know what we’re up against when your time comes. I want to be able to show you how to live life fully, and in order to do that I have to do it myself. I will no longer cower in the corner, afraid of who I could be. I am the person you look up to after all. 

You became the shore as I was lost at sea.

While I thought I had a life that I was comfortable with, the fact of the matter is that there were storm clouds surrounding my life that I had no shelter for. You became the light amidst all the dark. You are the light of my life. My Dawn. My sunrise. The eternal light that illuminates every corner of my soul. 

I learned how strong I truly am.

There were times I didn’t know I could make it through the night, let alone one more day. You were upset, I was upset, we hadn’t slept at all. I couldn’t see those times as I do now. With you in my life, I’ve learned strength and endurance.

I also learned how to stand strongly in myself and my convictions. I am an opinionated woman, but with your presence I’ve found I don’t shrink myself or those opinions to fit the mold of what others want of me; especially if it comes to you and your future on this earth. 

You changed the way I see love.

Since you came into my life, love songs have a whole new meaning to me. The first time I listened to “I Don’t Wanna Miss a Thing” by Aerosmith after your appearance, I cried. I realized those songs I once put on mixed CDs for boyfriends in high school *shudders* are now the ones that I want to put on playlists to belt out to you at the top of my lungs.

I never knew how unconditional love can truly be before you. There is nothing that could ever stop me from loving you, and that sentence, to me, is so powerful. Not all of us are able to grasp what unconditional love is, but I have found my understanding of it because of you. 

My first thought is always of you and your wellbeing. Always. 

From the moment I wake up to the instant I fall asleep, I am always thinking of you and your wellbeing. How can I make life better for you? It’s one of the reasons I’m working so diligently on making sure I am the best I can be for you. Even if I falter sometimes, it’s never a reflection of my love for you. That love never, ever will waver. 

Dearest child,

The moment you came into my world, you changed everything about me. I became a mom the instant I knew of your existence, and I will be so until the day I die. I have cried thousands of tears, laughed until my abs hurt, felt my heart tighten with pride and awe, and so much more in your short years on this earth, and they have been the absolute best years of my life. You forever changed me, my beautiful daughter. And for that….

Thank you for choosing me to be your momma. 

Feature Image by Nathan Dumlao on Unsplash

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