Why He Isn’t Texting You Back After Your Amazing First Date

When we become interested in someone and go on a first date, we expect our date to text us shortly after that first date. In some cases, though, that doesn’t happen at all – he stops texting you back after the first date.

Why hasn’t he texted you back after a date you thought was amazing?

Most likely, he’s avoiding you because he’s just not interested in you but doesn’t have the balls to tell you that. Us girls know when we’re not a guy’s first choice. As a matter of fact, this just happened to me a month ago.  

I met this guy from my town, and we would text every day. He would even call me on his lunch breaks. We planned to go to a restaurant and have dinner, but then, all of a sudden, he stopped texting and calling. He even cancelled our dinner date because he was ”sick.” When the day of the date came, he texted me asking if we could meet up that day.

I showed my mom the texts, and she said to really look at what he texts me. I told my mom I wasn’t going to make myself available to him since he was giving off bad vibes. I’m not desperate enough to go on a date with anyone who stops trying to make an effort to get to know me.

I realized that he might have not been texting me back because he thought that I’m the “clingy girl.” I love to check in on my dates and see how they’re doing, but when he started ghosting me, I realized that I might have gone overboard.

One day, I saw him and asked him why he never responded.

He said I was too clingy, and he just didn’t have time for a girl like me.  

His words crushed me at first, but I learned that if a guy is not putting in effort to get to know you, don’t force him to pay attention. Put your time into someone who wants to get to know you as a person.

Finding someone who will love you for who you are will be better in the long run.

If he doesn’t text you back, don’t be disappointed. He’s just one fish in the sea, and there are plenty more who will actually return your texts.

Featured Photo by Chad Madden on Unsplash.


  1. This is all good advice. However, as women, we can’t keep going back ‘fishing’ everytime we are rejected – it’s not how it works. There are issues of safety, of the amount of personal information we give to people, of reputation even.
    It’s become apparent that society is moving in the wrong direction in this respect, men displaying a total lack of commitment just because there is plenty of fish in the sea. Women simply can’t do this and I don’t know a single woman out there who doesn’t want a relationship rather then casually dating – that’s almost something else.
    This kind of solution is repeated by almost anyone and everyone out there giving advice on this kind of situation, but clearly it isn’t a promising solution for women.


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