This is me letting you in.
This is me opening up to you, learning to trust again, letting love encapsulate my entire being. I resolve to show that you are undeniably rare, wholly beyond compare, even as I pray that you won’t break my heart.
This is me embracing vulnerability.
I speak when I’d rather swallow the secrets that consume me. I strip myself down to the stinging wounds that slice through my heart, hoping that you won’t infect my trust with broken promises. Unhesitatingly, I let you be my salve, the remedy that heals the gaping gashes festering within my soul.
This is me trusting you to carry my storms.
I release my grip on smiles and laughter, allowing myself to cry again. I learn to believe that you will cherish me through both the darkness and the light. Without reservations, I allow you to closely guard my heart, the same way I have shielded it for an eternity. I teach you to sail through the thrashing, murky waters of my soul, to captain my ship heart-in-heart with me as we weather the deafening thunder together.
This is me believing you when you call me “beautiful.”
I wholeheartedly struggle against the urge to fight you; my only weapon my every flaw, but I resist, letting the music of your words warm my heart. I wonder how many times those treasured words have escaped your lips, how many other women have blushed with joy before me, but I gradually savor your serenade. I know that in this moment, there is only us; gleaming eyes interlocked, crimson lips intertwined, your hands caressing the gentle curves of my body as if I am your work of art, your perfectly sculpted statuette.
This is me learning to feel for you.
I discover my heavy, numb blockade lifting as my heart overflows with light, giddy joy. My soul relishes every sensation: my racing heart, my trembling legs, my feverish desire to run to you. I treasure the fluttering in my stomach as we plan a future, the swelling of my heart as you declare what I mean to you. I immerse myself in a blissful high as I sink into you, drowning in careless euphoria without a lifeline, without anyone to catch me but you.
This is me hoping that you won’t break my heart.
I surrender my fear and fall alongside you, knowing that at any moment, my heart could shatter like glass. I begin to trust that you will remain beside me, steadfastly, unyieldingly. My feelings for you run wild and free, as I pray that you will not escape with anyone but me. I envelop myself in your infinite delights, knowing that the empire we’ve built could crumble, but instead allowing your soul to satiate mine for eternity.
This is me letting you in.
This is me removing the shield from my heart, surrendering myself to your love, and opening my soul to falling purely, truly, deeply alongside you.
Previously published on Thought Catalog.