What To Do If Your Significant Other Winds Up in Jail

It’s a conversation many of us believe we’ll never have — so it can be devastating to get that phone call late at night delivering the bad news. Having your partner wind up in jail is never an easy process. Overcoming this challenge is likely going to be strenuous on you both, but there are options that can help with this particularly tough problem.

Stay Calm

Staying calm is probably the last thing on your mind — you’re feeling shocked, angry, confused, and more. However, doing so is essential. The reality is your partner is stuck in jail feeling helpless and afraid, you’re going to have to be their rock. Unfortunately, your partner has lost a lot of their freedoms, this can include contact with their family and work. By remaining calm, you can start putting the necessary actions into motion and notifying the right people.

Posting Bail

Your partner’s bail has likely already been set by the time they call you. After contacting your partner’s lawyer (if you can) all three of you may make the decision to post bail in order to get your partner released. According to AWAD Legal Team, there are several ways to post bail for your partner:

  • Cash Bond: This is a one-time payment made in full, either by cashier’s check, money order, or credit card, depending on what forms of payment the local jail or court will accept. One benefit of posting a cash bond is you’ll likely be able to get your money back after your partner’s case is settled.
  • Professional Bond: A professional bonding company is another option, but they will charge you a percentage of the total bail amount in order to get your partner released. Moreover, if for whatever reason, your partner fails to appear in court, you lose collateral for your bond and won’t get your money back.
  • Property Bond: If you happen to own property, using your equity is another option to utilize. The catch is, your property often needs to be worth at least two times the amount of bail in order to secure your partner’s release.
  • Signature Bond: A signature bond, also known as an own recognizance (OR) bond, allows a person to be released on their promise to return to court (without having to pay). Your partner’s judge will consider several factors in order to decide if their eligible for an OR bond such as their financial situation, severity of the charges, criminal record, and their likeliness to return to court.

Familiarizing yourself with bail options can help both you and your partner decide on the best one to go forward with.

Utilize Counseling

Unfortunately, your relationship is probably going to be put under a lot of strain as you try to navigate through this troubling time. Emotions run high in stressful situations such as this. With that in mind, it’ll be worth looking into visiting a therapist to help the two of you work through this in a healthy, productive way. You might be feeling like they’ve broken your trust or betrayed you, and keeping those emotions bottled up won’t do you any favors.

Furthermore, encouraging your partner to attend counseling with you can help them vent a lot of their frustrations and open up about the situation. If they seem apprehensive to go at first, counseling experts at Bradley University explain, “If your partner initially voices his or her concerns about counseling, listen to what he or she is saying instead of getting upset or angry right away. Once you listen, rationally discuss how counseling could improve the [relationship] and bring you closer together as a couple.” It’s important to work as a team during and after their time in jail and court. Being able to effectively communicate is going to be essential in getting your relationship back on track.

For better or worse, you’ve decided to stick by your partner’s side. When you partner winds up in jail, your world can seem completely shaken, and you might find yourself feeling lost in all the chaos that happens after they’re arrested. Staying calm, putting together a game plan, and working to mend your relationship are all important ways to get you and your partner’s world back on its proper axis.

Featured image via Unsplash.


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