Home College 7 Growing Pains Your Friend Group Will Experience After College

7 Growing Pains Your Friend Group Will Experience After College

Graduating college is one of the greatest accomplishments you’ll ever have in your life. It’s such a huge deal for so many reasons and to so many people. It also signifies growth, change, and new beginnings, all of which are primarily unknown.

Within months of collecting your diploma you’ll notice how fast the world is changing around you. And how your friendships begin to switch gears a bit, even when you always promised it wouldn’t. The problem is, for the first time in a long time, you and your friends won’t be exactly on the same page in terms of what your doing with you’re lives.

Conversations May Seem Awkward

Because you don’t have school in common anymore and you are at semi-different stages of life you’ll find it hard finding common topics. You’ll go through phases where you can’t relate to your friend’s stories or problems. Your convo’s will shift to talking about more adult-like problems and concerns. Gone are the days of crazy party and hook up stories…. Kind of.

You’ll Really Have to Start Coordinating Schedule’s to Hang Out

With a new life comes new responsibilities and new schedules. So you’ll feel like you haven’t seen each other in a while. So in order to ensure you’ll actually see your friends you’ll have to plan it around everyone’s schedules, which can get difficult when you take into account their work hours, additional responsibilities, and the time of day.

Distance Becomes Very Probable

If some of your friends were from school everyone may move back to their hometowns, so you’ll have to deal with some distance. Some of your hometown friends may even find work somewhere else so they may have to move to get their dream job. FaceTime dates and group chats will be your main source of communication rather than physically being together.

Discovering New Hang Out Spots Will Be Frustrating

If it’s not on campus and in your town, you have to rely on the recommendations of others. Which you’ll find isn’t always the most helpful. You’ll soon find where people your age hang out or which bars are the best in town, but it’ll take a lot of “bad” nights out to find the best ones.

Finding Balance In Your Schedule to Accommodate Everything and Everyone

Because everyone is so busy and absorbed in their own lives you may find that you might have to focus on individual friendships rather than the group as a whole. It means you may have to only go to dinner with one friend a time. Or plan a weekend trip to see one person because you can’t be bothered with waiting around for everyone to be free for once. You take new opportunities to do things solo because you can’t accommodate everyone anymore so you do what’s best for you.

Dealing With Losing Friends Along The Way

You’ll inevitably lose friends along the way sadly, and no matter how hard we try to keep them, the effort may not be reciprocated. You’ll struggle with feelings of regret, hurt, confusion and guilt. But the best friends to keep around are the friends who make as much as an effort to keep you in their lives too.

Finding Patience During This Transitional Period

You’ll be mad things aren’t the way they used to be. You’ll be frustrated with the failed attempts to hang out and rejection. And you’ll be beyond being patient while you figure out how your new friendships will work and be maintained. But this struggle will be the most rewarding!

It doesn’t mean that your friendships will end completely or that you guys will never see each other again. It just means that you will experience some growing pains that may seem unusual or different for you. You’ll need to take different approaches to make your friendship last. It’ll be hard finding your new groove, but patience will be rewarding!

Featured image Antonino Visalli on Unsplash 



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