Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. Or, if you live in the United States of America, hell hath no fury like a woman who didn’t get to purchase Lilly Pulitzer for Target.
The insanity began Sunday when Target (or Targét if you prefer the department store to have some retail flair or sound French for no reason at all) released its Lilly Pullitzer for Target collection, available online and in stores for a limited time. “Limited time” in the most literal way possible, seeing as in a matter of minutes floral frenzied females bought EVERY. SINGLE. ITEM. ON. THE. PLANET.
In theory, I love the idea of making a fairly upscale clothing line available for the masses. Some people yearn for the pastel tinged designs but can’t quite afford to drop $200 on a dress. (Silent ode to the $50 in my bank account right now.) This also isn’t the first time Target has made such a deal. The multi-billion dollar corporation has exclusive contracts with Converse, and designers Liz Lange, Isaac Mizrahi and Mossimo Giannulli.
But like most everything, the rapacious human race had to go ruining something good once again. With a price range from $2 to $150, it is all but surprising that the 250-piece collection had ravenous bargain shoppers in a craze. I thought I heard about it at all – the indignant tweets expressing the sentiments of dejected shoppers who left empty handed; the interminable lines outside filled with unabashed customers eager to enter the bright red doors and fulfill all of their coral and baby blue dreams; the vacant racks that looked as if they got hit by a vicious tornado. You can’t help but laugh at the absurdity of the situation. These people are insane.
Then I heard about my friend’s 10-year-old cousin who so earnestly wanted one pink dress and but was deprived of getting it because some selfish patron needed that same dress in every size and color. When asked if she would sacrifice one of the many (all) she had in her shopping cart, she said, “why would I do that?” Um, I don’t know, maybe because it’s the right thing to do. Do you people even have a soul? COME ON.
And then there are the people who think they are deft entrepreneurs as they re-sell Lilly for Target on eBay at egregiously inflated prices. At that point, go to an actual Lilly store and buy to your heart’s content and your wallet’s demise. I mean, who’s really going to buy a $30 dress for $200? Oh right, NO ONE.
I have nothing.