I Promised Myself This Year Wouldn’t Be About You

“New year, new me”. That is the way my last 4 years have started, and even though I try to do my best to be a different girl, everything ends up being about you.

I start to work out, so I can finally have the body I’ve always wanted. I swear I’m doing it for myself, but at the end of the day when I get home and take a shower after that intense training routine that takes my breath away, I dream about our date and me wearing the black skin tight dress you’ve always liked.

I start reading new books, and I constantly tell myself that it’s because I want to learn and explore different worlds., But deep inside, all I want is to have a smart conversation with you, so you realize that I’m more than just my looks.

I try to update my social media every day and show to my family and friends a picture-perfect life, with all the fashion and fun included. I can’t complain of what I’ve achieved with my hard work, but all my heart craves is that you finally have the guts to come here, where I am, and share this journey with me.

I swear this year everything will be different. It won’t be about you, my dear. This time it’s going to be about me and about becoming the woman of my own dreams.

I got tired of waiting.

I got tired of half-ass texts.

I got tired of you being miles away, while I’m here just waiting for you to come.

I got tired of putting so much effort into this.

Now it’s time to leave, move on and explore a different world, one where you don’t belong.

I’m scared as hell about this new life.

It’s the first time in a while that I’ve decided…yes, decided, to be alone. It’s time to build myself up. Time to love myself in the ways I’ve never been able to before.

I’m not sure where life is going to take me.

I’m not sure how this year is going to end.

But I have faith and trust that I can.

Because this year, my love, won’t be about you…

This year will be about me.

Photo by Pete Bellis on Unsplash

3 COMMENTS

  1. Dear Team,

    Allow me to introduce myself as Sunita kandlapelli. I am a part of the Social Media Team at MyGlamm.

    MyGlamm is a makeup brand that has been created to simplify a woman’s makeup routine. Our multi-functional products have used innovation to not only reduce the number of products you need to carry in your handbag but also cut down on the number of steps you need to follow while applying makeup. Formulated using the finest of ingredients from Europe, our makeup
    products are enriched with special minerals, vitamins and oils that care for your skin and are also 100% cruelty free.

    As a brand, MyGlamm emphasizes on makeup education and education on related topics like skin care, beauty etc. in
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    I am writing to you to explore a potential guest blogging partnership with MyGlamm.

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    • Sunita,

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  2. Nice blog! This year, I promised it will be about me and started taking proper care of my skin. And so, I started using Skeyndor’s products and they were great. You must also use professional skin care products available at Skeyndor to take proper care of your skin.

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