I belong to the gender often mislabelled as the subordinate. We are a family who has been judged and mistreated poorly due to the senseless values of men that have been passed on from generation to generation. Of course, their manners have been altered, indicating that the society has changed in some way. But it’s still obvious that these changes are not seen in some, if not, in most private situations. There are times that I’ve witnessed oppression towards women, and I think to myself: “where are these new attitudes you men keep on imposing?” I have been baffled by the idea that men can just hypnotize us with their good looks and wits, and then hurt us once we are under their spells.
There was this one instance where a friend of mine had her first real relationship, and obviously, the love-sick mind of hers did not exactly see his flaws. I know what you’re going to say: Love will ALWAYS overlook your partner’s flaws. But, I don’t think that applies when the flaws of your partner includes: cheating on you, or emotionally abusing you to the point of non-stop crying. I assume you all know what I’m talking about, right? They give us the good ol’ flirtatious touches and make us feel all giddy and whatever. Then, in an instant, have us beg for them to stay because “we don’t know how to live without them.” Meanwhile, you have been living without them for the past 18 years. It is RIDICULOUS.
But what’s more tantalizing is that women also do cruel things to fellow women. WE GIRLS LOVE TO TALK NEGATIVELY ABOUT OTHERS, especially other girls. We’ve had all those instances where we might have said to another person about another girl: “God I hate her”; “she ruins my day all the time”; “gosh she’s so obnoxious”; “she’s such a bitch.” All the while, we have actually no idea who that girl really is. Is she really obnoxious and selfish? Or is she the opposite and just a human being who’s been having a bad day?
I have girlfriends who talk negatively about their own girlfriends to other people: “Oh, you know Cassandra has no goals whatsoever, I don’t know what guys see in her. She’s such a waste of potential, and she’s so annoying.” If you have gotten into this kind of situation, and you’re Cassandra, then you know how shitty this feels. It’s one thing to have a guy say it to you, but to come from your own girlfriend(s) just takes it to a whole new level.
Why can’t us girls just stick up for one another and stop gossiping about each other? Why do we have to stoop down at the guy’s level just to talk negatively about another girl? We have enough negativity coming from the opposite sex, and we all have felt what the other girl is experiencing. So, why waste all that energy on nonsense and just help each other out, right?
It all makes sense if you think about it.
I actually did a survey and I asked other women what they would do if they saw another girl being raped, and most of them answered with: “I’ll help them out.” We only have each other, and when “big” things are happening to other girls, we are prepared to help. But when it’s small like a gossip, we ignore it. It’s the same scenario, except this time it’s not physical and it’s being made by another girl.
If you hear another girl talk bad about their fellow-gendered human being, stop them. It is hurting our reputation and it is not a good foundation for a group that one day may save the world. We are superheroes, each one of us girls, which mean that we have to work on fighting oppression together, not individually. We need to empower each other when one feels useless. We are essentially The Avengers or Justice League of the world, and these group of superheroes can’t fight on their own. They need each other, and much like reality, we need each other to change the world.
Featured Image via We Heart It.