Another summer has come and gone, but I’m thinking despite the few pictures of you rocking your new swimsuit and going out with all of your friends, most of our summers didn’t quite live up to expectations of long vacations, long-lasting tans, and 100% fun 100% of the time. If you’re anything like me, your summer looked a little more like this…
You’re stoked because school is finally out and you can do ALL THE FUN THINGS! No more papers, all-night study sessions, or crying into a textbook when you want to be out with friends. Bring on the bonfires, summer flings, and living in swimsuits. JK, you’ll be avoiding human interaction for as long as possible.
But then all of your friends who you’d been making plans with before summer even started end up wanting to either 1) sleep in/stay home or 2) have to go to work every day. Cool guys. It’s fine, I’ll just throw myself a pity party for one. Total rager.
So you sit around your house and try not to be bored out of your mind, which leads to you discovering some, interesting, new activities. Like figuring out that you can contort your body to fit in your kitchen cabinet…don’t judge.
Instead of endless beach days you end up tanning in your backyard with all of your friends. Or plants. Same thing, right?
Finally, you get everyone together for a weekend getaway and you’re so excited you get a little ahead of yourself. WINE TASTING, DAY CRUISE, BAR HOPPING, SNORKELING, WHY NOT DO IT ALL?! You’re so freaking excited you get wasted before anyone else.
You remember later that you don’t have money to do it all so your weekend mostly consists of doing some more of your most skilled summer activity…nothing. Only this time, you’re doing nothing in a pretty place, with a few pretty people. Seriously though, I can barely afford to breathe nowadays, I don’t how you people do it.
The one time you attempt to go swimming you end up realizing the water is freezing cold and spend the rest of the day hoping you didn’t catch hypothermia. And HOLY SH*T something touched my leg! Oh, it was just seaweed? Looked like a shark to me, but whatever.
On the plus side, you do get some good Instas in your new sunhat. The down side, you can’t post anything yet because you have 27 pictures in your camera roll and you can’t see which one you like best (if any) because of this damn sun glare.
Then it’s back to reality, where everything sucks and you hate everyone.
Your parents say you’re being too lazy so they start dragging you around on all their errands. No, Mom, I don’t want to go with you to Wal-Mart. There’s a Law and Order SVU marathon on. Mom, I’m an adult now…you can’t tell me how to live my life.
Your siblings are always trying to invade your Netflix and chill time. Stupid kids don’t realize that Netflix and chill at school leaves very little room for you to actually watch Netflix. Priorities.
You really regret not going for that summer internship or staying in your college town for summer school. Thus, you compensate by eating all the food in your house. So much for that summer bod. Who are you kidding? It’s not like you went outside…EVER.
Before you can even buy another pint of Ben and Jerry’s, it’s time to go back to school. WHAT?! *cries into a tub of Ben and Jerry’s*
You go back to school with pictures from your what… two outings? It’s okay just promise yourself that you won’t tell anyone about all the boring days (so like, all the days). Really, you killed it this summer. Be proud. You go Glen Coco! How many days left before next summer?!
Featured Image via Tumblr.