He left me. My boyfriend who I’d spent the past 6 months waiting for, supporting, and sacrificing for came home only to say that we were over. However, about a month later, he claimed it was a mistake.
Sound familiar? The ex who comes back?
For me, it was an easy decision to take him back. But unfortunately it’s not always so obvious.
Many people would tell you to steer clear of continuing to see an ex. Things ended for a reason and anytime you or your partner have to question the relationship to that degree, it’s probably not meant to be. However, did you know you could be missing out on some seriously good relationship opportunities by writing someone off based on the past?
So how do you know when it’s right and when it’s just a time bomb that will blow up in your face?
Sometimes it just won’t work. Forcing things by giving into the remaining care and feelings you have for the person they were or what you shared, will never end well. You have to assess the relationship you had, the way it ended, and what’s happened since then It’s OK to say goodbye and insist it be forever if that’s what’s best to protect both your hearts from further damage.
But let me tell you this…my “ex” is now my husband. We had gone through a rough time and it was becoming more and more clear that sooner than later, a real commitment would have to come if it was going to last. Tensions built, resentments grew, and it seemed easier to walk away than try to get on the same page. People make mistakes. Nothing will sober you up to your true feelings more than the threat of forever losing the one you love. All the love was still there. When he came back and apologized, I knew nothing had changed about the future I’d envisioned with him. Sure, we had a lot of issues to work through, trust to be regained, sacrifices to make, and tough choices to consider, but in the end, it worked out. We are stronger and more appreciative of one another because of what we went through.
Don’t allow fear or social expectations to stop you from being with the person you care for. Sure, it may not work out. Yes, you may end up with even more pain. But what if it does work? Trust me, you won’t want to miss it.
“I do my thing and you do your thing. You are you and I am I. And if, in the end, we end up together, it’s beautiful.” – Topanga Lawrence, Boy Meets World
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